daughter thrown out

[mattymatt123]

This may sound harsh but does anyone know what the exact legal age my daughter has to be before i can force her to leave home ?? I really am at my wits end!!!

[ChocolatChip]

Do you ever talk to her calmly?
I would take her out to a restaurant, you and your partner, and speak to her about the situation. She would be less likely to kick off in the middle of a restuarant for the embarrassment factor.
Make agreements with her rather than rules. If you tell her not to do something then she will go and do it. If you agree to something, say if she stays in and tidies her room then she can stay out longer, or have her friends round for a sleepover.
The carrot treatment, I would think, would be a lot more sensible than the stick treatment.

[ladyalex]

If all was well six months ago, sounds like something is very much wrong now. This behaviour sounds a bit worse than teenage hormones.
Try to find out what is wrong with her.
Do you really want your beautiful daughter to go and live in some homeless hostel ? Or worse.

[treborrobert]

all i can say is ...ok she is 15 and haven sex ...trust me you carnt stop it she will still do it ...but if you are geting on her back all the time she will kick of with you ...

i say except it and i am sure she is well upto date with sex pregnancy and s.t.d .....

let her make her own mistakes only she will be responsable

pusspuss i take it you are a cat lover ..well i would say kickin kids out is more dreadfull than a cat ???

but persons like you probly put pets first !!!!! SAD OR WHAT !!

[beatle3]

16....think she may have some problems,no want scare ya but hear drugs can make kids like this....is someone putting her up to it....ya fronterd her about stealing....i tend to agree with velvteers...give her 3 strike and out tell her that...bit of tuff love here me thinks....tell her that

[ellarella]

Having been a difficult child, I see that although it could have been an imaginable resolution on my Mother's part, the fact that I wasn't thrown out has been tantamount to my overriding any teenage resentment and rudeness that I unjustifiably had towards her. It's important to remember that this resentment and rebellion mainly stems from self-absorption and hormones, both of which are normally accountable, however clich�d they may be.
I think that it would be worth looking at the bigger picture: although she may be being difficult now, imagine throwing her out and potentially severing all ties with her, missing out on her currently dormant personality that will show itself with age and experience AND reaping so much more resentment that resolve would never be an option.
What with the sunshine showing itself I can suggest having a barbeque and inviting all her friends, and then disappear for a bit and maybe even produce some alcohol (a bacardi each - whoa there!) depending on how daring you may be. Invite your friends too so you can have seperate fun - together if that makes sense. You should find a way of coming to some sort of compromise - give her some space and freedom.

[ellarella]

I meant breezer! Tuesday is the new Monday!

[kat2206]

Matty, you say that your daughter started "kicking off" about 6 months ago.... Can you cast your mind back to that time and see if something has happened to her in this time that has possibly made her act like this?

Something dreadful happened to me when I was a young girl (I'm now nearly 40) and rather than "kicking off" I withdrew and became very reclusive, maybe something has happened to her and she is hurting, emotionally and physically and needs your help and the only way she can get that attention from you is by acting up.

Instead of kicking your daughter out, why dont you go down the "old fashioned" route and love her instead, that way, if something is troubling her then she may open up to you.

I just wish my daughter was alive to be "kicking off" so think yourself lucky every day that you have her with you.

[pusspuss]

treborrobert i mad be sad but your a sicko which is worse

[pastafreak]

I went thru sheer hell with my daughter when she was 15....we had moved 150 away from family friends....and school. The first year, as she did her gcse's was fine but trouble was brewing. The night her year10 exams were over,she and a mate were arrested for shoplifting in Debenhams....she was already showing signs of extreme rebellion. The next 18 months were a nightmare....a boyfriend 10 years older....the police being constantly called while she was still under 16.....me pacing the floor,never sleeping while her dad snored away!...she did well on her gcec's but had needed speed to cope...she was 5'6" and weighed only 7 1/2 stone...she was grey!.......BUT-she got of the bad influences....the mate who stole from her, and got her to take the speed and ecstasy, the 'boyfriend'......she is a survivor...now 22,at uni in London.....I never kicked her out-tho she did go on her own....but she learned from those mistakes and is a VERY strong young woman. DON'T GIVE UP

[DrFilth]

first thing you need to do is try to stay calm i have known two friends who have had this same problem. one ended up having a nervous breakdown and ended up on about 8 tablets a day , do not know how it ended as he had to pack work in on health grounds. the second person got social services involved and the girl was taken into care, she ended up as a prostitute.this was a very sad story and i only found out the details from another friend.when your daughter is sixteen she will probably get pregnant so that the council give her a flat (get away from you ) and get benefits, this is so she will get more than a low paid job.
people like treborrbert make me sick. A DOG IS FOR LIFE NOT JUST CHRISTMAS.you are one sick in the head person.

[treborrobert]

what the hell are you all going on about ...i never said kick dogs out or cats... and i am not sick or mad !!!!

i was just given a comment to pusspuss that she said " persons that kick cats out are sick ....?????? and the question was kicken her daughter out ??/... i was just saying as you put it "pets are for life not christmas " and my feelings was daughter comes first !!!!... and that she is not a dog or cat .... so will you please get your facts straight next time ok !!!!........how dare you say i am sick ...i love all pets !!! and i have never kick a pet out in my life !!!

how dare you call me !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[treborrobert]

yes cats and dogs are for life ....but so is his daughter !!!!!!!!

just because you carnt cuddle her.... you sound like you hate your daughter so she has no chance as she ...!! she is a young lady ,,,NOT A CHILD........so treat her like one ...and well said the person who said ...kick her out .. let a pinp get her and sell her body for sex...and drugs ......you are 100% right ... but the dad wouldnt care she is out of his life ......till she dies... then it WHY WHY WHY........TO BLOODY LATE THEN !!!!......deal with it dont kick her out ..SHE IS YOUR DAUGHTER.............

[treborrobert]

pimp ...sorry

[slark]

treborrobert the euphemistic way you have quoted
( AND KICKIN HER OUT !!!...she is not a cat or dog you just give up on !!!...)
makes it sound like you are cruel to animals and you started then to call someone sad why be suprised if animal lovers start making remarks about you.

[slark]

"The purity of a person's heart can be quickly measured by how they regard animals" ~ Anonymous

[kat2206]

For goodness sake!!!

What Treborrobert was trying to say is that some people in this world/country throw their pets out without a second thought to their wellbeing etc.

Treborrobert was using this "statement" if you like to express his feelings with regards to mattymatt123 question, he is a father to this child and so he should act like one rather an irresponsible father (pet owner) and throw his daughter out without a care in the world.

After thinking long and hard about this last night, I have come to a theory (maybe quite incorrectly, and I will stand corrected, if I am wrong) but I think there maybe a new "woman" in mattymmatts life and his daughter doesnt like her and is rebelling, or mattymatt just wants his daughter now out of the way and wants rid of her like a piece of old baggage or in treborroberts analogy, like an unwanted pet.

Stop having a go at treborrobert and start pointing the finger where it should be at, AND THAT IS AT THE FATHER WHO OBVIOUSLY DOESNT CARE A JOT FOR HIS DAUGHTER!

Like I said last night, I just wish my daughter was still alive, so love your children and stop making blasted stupid statements and having ideas of kicking them out!

[DrFilth]

so kat226 if someone called you sad whetever you would not be bothered.???? come on mattymatt where is your reply

[kat2206]

I really don't understand your point DrFilth, of course I wouldnt give a jot if someone called me sad, trust me, i've been called worse!

However I do agree with you that mattymatt should be replying to these messages or has he kicked her out already?

COME ON MATTYMATT ANSWER US, WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO?