whos right?????

[thinkpinky]

basically, i have 2 children, 1 of which is from a previous relationship. my husband has brought up this child as his own, loved her, cared, clothed, paid dinner money for etc etc. now the bio father suddenly wants parental responsibility? i cannot for the air in my lungs understand why he cares all of a sudden, however, as he is the bio father i have allowed him to see the child, as it is only fair to her she is given that chance. to know her bio dad.

the bio dad is off to fight some war wi the army in july, for 12 month. he applied for army wen lil 1 was 3(so that aint a excuse) he has beten me, mentally tortured me and just used foul, offensive language towards me, in front of my daughter. on 1 occasion he said he would burn the house down wi us in it in front of my daughter. he has also attempted to break into my home, whilst we were indoors. i have been too terrified for our lives to call the police, he turned things around to make me out to be the bad parent, i have been depressed because of this man for 6 years.

he claims to be takin me to court for pr on 17th.

what is the likliness he will get it???

both me and my husband are in employment, as a result of our wages(our solicitor told us) we are not eligeble for legal aid, however. with 2 kids, 2 cars(which we both need) the rent and bills etc. we have little money left and cannot afford legal advice.

all sensible comments welcom with thanks

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Rtaxron]

I can not comment on your personal life because I am only hearing one side of the story, but you can go to the Citizens Advice Bureau, its free in your area.

[natalie_1982]

Also, there is a law section on this site, maybe someone could help you in that section? Good luck sweet xx

[naflharrison]

i have come across this before where the bio father suddenly wanted access but his problems were that he was a recreational drug user and the solicitor said that it would be very unlikely that he would recieve access rights given the circumstances. not the same circumstances completely as yours but if this man is violent and threatening your lives do you not think it would be in your daughters best interest to keep this man away from her and let ehr carry on living with her true father (not bio father) as in your partner who has given her love and cared for her. i really believe that having contact with this man could cause your daughter more harm than good. my own step-sisters mother walked out on her when she was 3 and she is now 19 has a baby of her own but is really struggling with depression and we are having trouble getting thru to her at the moment. this is damage done by a vicous woman. i also strongly suggest that you demand that the police protect you from this man as it is your duty to protect not only your daughter but your other child and partner from someone who is potentially threatening your life. please keep your daughter as far away from this man as possible as it could strongly affect her development into adult-hood. please protect your family. keep this man away from your family.

[daisycup]

I would also advise you to consult CAB. Also, everytime he threatens you etc, write everything down. Keep a note of all times/dates etc.... might come in handy and if will help you remember everything. Good luck!

[snow.maiden]

Tp - I'm sorry that you had to agree to this violent unpleasant man having access to his daughter. Does he pay towards her upkeep? If not, then the CSA ought to be notified, so that they can work out a right and proper amount he should be contributing. The CAB will advise you on your rights, but if you can prove how he's treated you - and in front of his daughter - then maybe he'd get only supervised access rights, which'd be safer and make you feel less anxious. As Daisycup says, note down everything unpleasant, with time and date - any threats, abusive phone calls, etc., and produce these as evidence. I'm sure that a Welfare Rights Officer could also advise you of your legal rights (free of charge) if you contacted your Council or local MP.

[grumpy80]

If you have legal proof of his behaviour then you will have no probs!