only child

[zzxxee]

i have two kids aged 11 and 17 my brother has a seven year old daughter my mum really puts the pressure on for him to have another but he is very rude what do people think about just having one child through choice?

[bednobs]

i think your mum sounds very rude, not your brother, it's none of her business and she has no right emotionally blackmailing him to have a child!

i think the key word in your post is CHOICE

[barney1966]

totally agree with bedknobs

[monkeyeyes]

Didn't do me any harm................:o)

[I Love Snow]

Or me !

[smudge]

I posted a question asking what it's like to be an only child &/or having an only child last week zzxxee.

I think it's entirely up to your brother & his partner whether or not they would like to have another child - not your Mum.

P'raps she feels that her granddaughter may be 'lonely', but she may very well grow up happy & well adjusted.

[daffy654]

If anyone ever put pressure on me to have another child then I too would be very rude back.!!!

[Totterdown]

zzxxee - If you think hard enough, you willl realise it is your mother who is the rude one here. It is not for her, or you by association, to dictate how anyone else should plan their family. You and your mother should be careful you do not lose your brother and his family by interfering.

[jack daniels]

Totally agree with the others here. It's entirely up to your brother & his partner to how many children they want, after all aren't they the ones bringing the child up, expenses & all?
We have 2 children & my hubby only wanted 1 - I selfishly wanted another child so that the first wouldn't be an only child or god forbid, my thinking was 'if anything had of happened to the only child I would never have forgiven myself for not having another!'
Looking back I would've been happy enough with 1 but I can't imagine life without my second child too.

[annie0000]

How do you even know that they are able to have a second child if they wanted one? Can you imagine having the pressure of your parents on your back in addition to the pain of not being able to have a child - even if you already have one?

Having said that, even if they were perfectly able to have another child, why should they bring a child into the world unless they really wanted one, that isn't fair to anybody and to be honest everyone else should butt out of their business and concentrate on contributing to the life of the child he does have.

I dont think it matters a stuff whether you are an only child or 1 of 10, it is they love and care that your are brought up with that counts

[Velvetee]

I'm pregnant with my first, but don't think I will have another as I don't think I could cope and it's silly to have a child just because family are pressurising.

I think as long as your only child is encouraged to socialise and take part in activities involving their peers, they can have a happy and fulfilled childhood. My child will have older cousins, so there will be an extended family there.

[Ice.Maiden]

Congratulations Velvetee.
I come from a large family myself, and now have an even larger extended family, which is lovely, but i think it's up to the individual couple as to how many they want - or get!

[zzxxee]

yes my mum does put the pressure on but there is no need for him to tell her shes an interfering slag nice choice of words dont you think to say to a woman in her 60s

[annie0000]

Maybe he has tried telling her nicely and iit hasn't worked and he has reached the end of his tether with it? You don't know what other pressures he may be under. At the end of the day, it may be harsh and what he said wasn't nice, but maybe that's all she understands and tbh if she is her 60s then she should know better by now - she is also hardly in her dottage - 60s is not that old.

[Totterdown]

xxzzee, your mum has no business whatsoever to put the pressure on. In your brother's (and most other people's) she IS an interfering old s**g. Perhaps you could invite her to read all the replies to your original question.

[zzxxee]

yes i agree totterdown she can be interfering but dont you dare call her an interfering slag how dare you , make a remark about someones mother you dont no you rude arrogant awful person

[gina32]

so why does she think that your brother ought to have more children??

[Totterdown]

Cut a raw nerve there didn't I? Couldn't care less what you think of me. You should concentrate on getting your message over to your mother.

[Totterdown]

I would also add that it was YOU who first mentioned the s**g word. Also it was YOU who asked the original question and people have responded to your question. Not one person has agreed with with you or your mother, You wanted answers, but do not like the replies. You say how dare I use that word about someone I do not know. I did because I agreed with what your brother said. I could say how dare you call me a rude, arrogant awful person, because you do not know me. But I really don't care about people calling me anything. Unlike you, I do not get heated about people I do not know.

[zzxxee]

i mentioned the word slag because its what my brother called her not me and you said you agree when you dont even know the woman you idiot look up the word slag in the dictionary totterdown and tell me how you can say someone is that when you have never met them

[zzxxee]

if you bother to read what i said i said yes my mother does put pressure on my brother and NO i do not agree with this but i do not agree with him calling my mum a slag and his choice of rude words they are both at fault i simply asked peoples opinion on what they think of people having an only child by choice not an opinion on a womans character they do not no READ THE QUESTION TOTTERDOWN