ChatterBank1 min ago
visiting grandparents
28 Answers
my baby isn't even born yet and this is stressing me out!!
mother in law lives 40 min drive away but she doesn't drive so we go to her. my parents live 2 hour drive away but they drive so have ability to visit more.
MIL has 3 other grandchildren; this will be my parents' first.
my problem is.. i just know MIL will feel left out, but I know my folks will drive here and make more of an effort. also, claws out, I want them to be closer to the child cos they're just more loving. I'm going to spending a lot of my time alone with the baby cos of OH's work patterns, is it selfish of me to want my mum to be more involved?
I don't know if I'm even expecting answers, i just wanted to vent!!
mother in law lives 40 min drive away but she doesn't drive so we go to her. my parents live 2 hour drive away but they drive so have ability to visit more.
MIL has 3 other grandchildren; this will be my parents' first.
my problem is.. i just know MIL will feel left out, but I know my folks will drive here and make more of an effort. also, claws out, I want them to be closer to the child cos they're just more loving. I'm going to spending a lot of my time alone with the baby cos of OH's work patterns, is it selfish of me to want my mum to be more involved?
I don't know if I'm even expecting answers, i just wanted to vent!!
Answers
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.Hi JB - I think you are entitled to be as self-centred as you choose. I have gotten passed the whole 'what will so-and-so' think/feel/say about me. It's you baby and your life - there's no need to be outright rude or mean but sod them. Do what makes you happy and enjoy your time with the little one.
Course you want your Mum - I wanted my Mum when I was preggy and my daughter wanted me but due to living on different continents at the time, we both had to settle for in laws - both were absolutely brilliant as it happened. You aren't a million miles away from either and babies are very portable so make a plan and don't exclude either g/parents - both sets are invaluable so embrace them and stop stressing! you are pregnant - rejoice! good luck
HI JB - I'm not saying to exclude them or anything but your OH is not around a lot and you've both yet to experience what it is actually like to have a baby (yes, they are very portable but routine is really important if you actually want any sleep, etc). Just see how things pan out - your hormones are going mental at the moment so OH is never going to get very far in a 'discussion'. We moved nearer to my parents 3 years ago and never actually saw them any more than we did before the move.
sherrard, my hormones are raging at the moment! I left work furious about something, arrived home in tears, and have hardly stopped since!
ttfn, nice to see you, hope you're well? you know what I'm like with the outlaw, but deep down, I'd never want to hurt her. I just know my own mum will be such the doting grandma - she's even offering to stay with me when I'm due in case I go into labour when OH is on a shift. she just wants to be involved bless her
ttfn, nice to see you, hope you're well? you know what I'm like with the outlaw, but deep down, I'd never want to hurt her. I just know my own mum will be such the doting grandma - she's even offering to stay with me when I'm due in case I go into labour when OH is on a shift. she just wants to be involved bless her
Hi JB - at least you know that you are crying because of the hormones (whatever is bothering you - forget about it, it's not important in the scheme of things). Also wanted to say, if you are going to be on your own a lot when the baby comes, you must make the effort to go for walks, etc. I've been there and it can really get you down so just get out (unless it's bucketing it down). x