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Alcohol
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What's the quickest way to get drunk?
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For more on marking an answer as the "Best Answer", please visit our FAQ.The body has to warm alcohol to body temperature before absorption can begin, so you could try drinking slightly warmed spirits, such as whisky or vodka. Food in the stomach also delays the absorption process, so drink on an empty stomach to speed thing up. If you are unsure of your toleration levels, ensure you have a sober friend on hand to 'baby sit' for you and keep you out of harm's way.
The quickest way is the "Yuppie lunch", pioneered in the eighties by surprisingly, stockbrockers who wanted to get drunk on their lunch hour but had to go back to work sober.Warning,this is fine as a one off, but do not do more than one and do not do it on a regulr basis.
Pour straight Vodka onto a teaspoon and snort it directly up your nose.The alcohol buypasses the bloodstream and is absorbed through your nasal membrane and goes directly into your brain.The result is instant drunkness the equevelent of which is downing 10-15 shots.It only lasts for five minutes,but can give a headache and sneezing fits.Oh and it dosn't work if you have a cold, but at least you can drive.