residency orders

[thundermouse]

When i was just 16, i had my first child, who is now 6. As she was 3 months prem , she she needed alot of care and attention. my parents offered to look after her if i wanted to go back to college, but they would need to be able to give permission for her to have medical attention if she needed it. So we agreed on a residency order. As my daughter grew older my parents slowly took over and now my mum is reluctant to let her come live with me and my partner of 3 years. we've just moved into a new house and had another baby.
I'm in a stable home, a stable relationship and my partner loves her as if she was his own and wants her to come live with us as much as i do.
Before i go any further, i would like to know if this order is permanant, as i was only 16 when it was done. how do i find out?

[amonty1144]

You would first need to get a copy of the order but usually they are in force until the child gains their majority, usually 18.
I would seek legal advice from a solicitor as you will need to go back to court to get it revoked. in England this will be the Family Court , with a report from Cafcass or the local authority Social Work Department. In Scotland this is the Sheriif Court with a report from the Local Authority Social Work department.
The first step is to get your solicitor to contact the court to state your intention of seeking your child back.
Beware it can be a long and emotionally charged process.
Good luck

[tigwig]

thundermouse that sounds like a horrible situation. Is there no way you can have a sensible adult discussion with your parents? What does your daughter say about this, does she want to live with you? Your parents need it pointing out to them that they are not your daughter's mum and dad YOU ARE and I think it is terrible that they can refuse to let you take your own child back now you are sorted. One thing that does concern me though is if you have had the same partner for 3 years and your own house, why has it taken you this long to want her back?

[ruby27]

A residence order does last until the child is 16 unless there are exceptional reasons, when it would be extended to 18. If your parents obtained such an order it will be until your daughter reaches 16. Unless the order is revoked. However even without revocation your child could come to live with you by agreement between you and your parents.

It is by far better to do this by agreement, so that your daughter is not caught up between a family argument where your daughter will be torn between you and your parents.

I hope you and your parents can come to an arrangement that is best for your daughter as well as being acceptable to the adults concerned.