I work in an office with 3 guys and one guy ignores me completely. He never includes me in group discussions..?

[sallycroc]

I work in an office with 3 guys and one guy ignores me completely. He never includes me in group discussions..?
if the other 2 guys say something or refer to me about something he will say a brief comment. I just find his behaviour very bizarre.

On my first day he was kind of friendly and the other 2 made a good effort. Then as the days passed I started noticing that he just never acknowledges me...

I'm easy going and chat to most people. He has a girlfriend so its not like he fancies me. His behaviour is almost borderline ignorant. He made the other guys coffee but not me. He asks how they are but not me.

I tried making conversation with him last week and he kind of ignored me.

It's bizarre because he speaks to all the other guys ok. I don't know whether it's because I'm a girl and he just doesn't know how to behave. I just don't get it.

Last week I started to feel paranoid. He's not particularly attractive. He has some disease where he lost all his hair and I get a feeling he's insecure about that.

I have worked in a few offices and have never experienced this behaviour before. He's also a few years younger. Its odd because he's so chatty and noisy with others.

Any thoughts? I feel ok about it now because I've worked in other offices and met some lovely people. I don't whether this is mind games or just his personality?
3 hours ago - 4 days left to answer.

[Androcles]

Does he have to engage with you as part of the job? Or can you both get your jobs done without any real need for contact, so him ignoring you is a social issue, not a work one? If it is a work one, then he is not doing his job properly and you can complain.

If it is a social issue, have you done anything to upset him? Is he a a shy individual who deals well with people that he knows but finds "strangers" a problem. Is he worried by you, or have you made comments about him being diseased etc? Maybe you terrify him? Or is he just a miserable G*T, who can't handle work relationships with women?

[society]

where i work there's one female employee who smells horrible. i mean stink. it obvious she don't wear deodorant, her breath smells, i think she wears the same clothes over and over without washing them. she's ignored by everyone in the department due to her lack of personal hygiene.

i'm not saying you are smelly. sometimes we never understand why people do the things they do.
could it be you are serious and committed to your work and they have a more relaxed attitude?

[TTG]

He likes you...a lot.

[ChuckFickens]

whats with the

"3 hours ago - 4 days left to answer."

at the bottom of the question?

[dothawkes31]

what is 3 hours ago and who has 4 days left to answer?

[craft1948]

Are you friendly enough with the other guys to ask them if they know of any problems he has with you?

[dothawkes31]

oh just clicked, you've posted this on another site.

[ChuckFickens]

so they have dot

http://answers.yahoo....20091208023411AAtaXCh

[dothawkes31]

ahh, so cindy and sally both have similar problems,

[society]

OMG i could just imagine how Sally must be turning red all red in the face after seeing your last post, Chuck

[cazzz1975]

I suppose there is nothing wrong with asking the question on 2 sites..?

I would ask the other guys, maybe he feels a bit intimidated by you, especially if he has confidence issues with his appearance...

[ChuckFickens]

LOL socicty

Nothing wrong with them posting on more than one site, just looked a little strange with the "3 hours ago - 4 days left to answer. " at the bottom of the post.

[Androcles]

At least she came to the right place for an answer in the end!

[dothawkes31]

I sonder if cindy got as good replies as sally did though.

[saxy_jag]

One of my bosses is a bit like this. It's not that he has a problem with any particular people, but if they're not directly involved in working with him, he just doesn't register them. If he ever has cause to visit my 'other' workplace (another section of the same department, in a different building), then he'll chat to me because he knows me well, and he's like it with others on the office whom he's worked with over the years. But there are three people in the office whom he just doesn't need to come into contact with for work purposes and so he just, effectively, ignores them. One chap really dislikes him for this reason and once even refused to go to a social event because that boss was going to be there.

Or it could be, as TTG says, he just fancies you. Just because he has a girlfriend doesn't mean he can't look elsewhere.

[sallycroc]

why does he ignore me if he would fancy me?!

[kojak]

No disrespect, sally

What a croc!

"3 hours ago - 4 days left to answer" ALSO!!!

[ChuckFickens]

it's called being shy, some blokes don't know how to deal with people they fancy.