Amicable Separation/Divorce

[Yorkie580]

My wife and I have unfortunately decided that our relationship is over. We have two children. We've always contributed equally to the finances (in fact, due to some debt I have, she's paid more (percentage wise) of her income.) everthing is very amicable. we're not worried bout residence agreements (she'll have the kids most of the time, albeit I'll have a lot of access.) We're also not looking for claims against inheritance, pensions etc. Can one solictor represent us both for a separation agreement and subsequent divorce, or do we need to pay two lots of fees?

[boxtops]

No - I was in a similar situation (apart from the children) and it was made very clear to us that there could be conflict of interest if one solicitor acted for both of us. We each had to appoint our own. Interesting that you are thinking of a separation agreement - we did that too, it was very helpful to have a separation order already laid out when it came to divorce time two years later.

[Yorkie580]

Thanks for that. We're really just trying to keep the costs down rather than pay two lots of solicitors fees etc. And also we need to find two solicitors that are just going to allow us to separate amicably without a fight!

We're looking at a sepaartion agreement becaseu we want a formal agreement in place before we tell families and friends.... again to avoid advice from the sidelines about fighting each other for more. If we can say that it's done and dusted, they'll have to accept the fact that we're not at war!

[hippyhoppy]

We had amicable divorde (if such a thing exists!) - I didn't have a solicitor.. he (ex husband) did all the work and I just signed anything he put in front of me.. folly of me maybe, but we get on better now than we did 5 years ago...! So in short.. no, you don't need two solicitors..

[tonywiltshire]

This is a question that is frequently asked and there would be a definite conflict of interest for a solicitor to represent both parties, things may be amenable now but they may not stay that way and circumstances change.

You may be better served if you have a separation agreement, which may be legally binding rather than separating informally if you use a solicitor to advise you on this or not, a separation agreement places in writing the important aspects of your agreements such as children, property and financial affairs, you can obtain draft separation agreements on line very cheaply You may also wish to consider a judicial separation, which involves the court who have the same power as in divorce but it does not dissolve the marriage so neither partner is free to remarry.

[lampgb]

My wife and I divorced many years ago. It cost me £11. No solicitors were involved. A form was filled out to give reasons for the divorce. I attended a court hearing to obtain custody of our son. I asked for no support. She asked for no support. Easy if there is no animosity between the parties concerned. Solicitors can make things very messy. See a Citizens Advice person who may be able to help you both. All so very sad but best of luck.

[tamborine]

DIY - cheapest & quickest.

http://www.direct.gov...ingadivorce/index.htm

[Yorkie580]

Thanks everyone. We're going to apply direct to the court. To be fair, either of us could cite arguments of low level unreasonable behaviour. We flipped a coin, and I'm going to be the unreasonable one (story of my life).

When I hear people talk of the thousands of pounds they spend on divorce, i couldn't believe how cheaply it can be done if you do it yourself.

[boxtops]

Yorkie, we didn't have to cite anything at all - we separated (and the separation order identified the date of the formal separation) then two years later I applied for the divorce. If it's not contested, there is no problem - it was a long time ago for me, but as I recall we just listed the reason as "irreconcilable differences" - it was a no-fault divorce, just a parting of the ways.

[RATTER15]

I also had a DIY divorce, quite straightforward,no problems, I think it cost about £40.00