Life of Brian and The Holy Grail-Best lines/quotes/

[toonmilo]

What are everyones favourite lines/quotes from these two superb films??

[guinnessman]

Welease Wodewick !!!!!

[Mattk]

we'll call it a draw then !

[Dagman]

Cleese as a knight whose arm has been hacked off..."'Tis but a scratch!"

Palin as the Roman Emperor..."Have we got a Wodewick?"

[toonmilo]

Yeah, he's a Wobber, and a Wapist...........and a pickpocket!!

[Octavius]

So many, so many...

Brian: Excuse me. Are you the Judean People's Front?
Reg: F*** off! We're the People's Front of Judea

Reg: If you want to join the People's Front of Judea, you have to really hate the Romans.
Brian: I do!
Reg: Oh yeah, how much?
Brian: A lot!
Reg: Right, you're in.

Brian: Have I got a big nose, Mum?
Brian's Mother: Stop thinking about sex!
Brian: I wasn't!
Brian's Mother: You're always on about it. "Will the girls like this? Will the girls like that? Is it too big? Is it too small? "

Stwike him, Centuwion. Stwike him vewy wuffly!

Biggus Dickus: Let me come with you, Pontiuth. I may be of thome athithtanthe if there ith a thudden crithith!

oh I could go on all day....(and I haven't eaven started on the Holy Grail yet...!)

[Octavius]

I also like the man who took a vow of silence and had his toe trod on by Brian or something (memory fails me in this hour of need)...

Man: You bast**d, I haven't spoken for 40 Years.

Crowd:  IT'S A MIRACLE!

Ok, for THG I like the following...

 "Go and boil your bottoms, you sons of silly persons!"

and French Soldier to Sir Gallahad:

"Ah don' wanna talk to you no more, you empty-headed animal food-trough wiper! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!"

[toonmilo]

Bring out yer Dead!!

Bring out yer Dead!!

I'm not dead!!!!......................WHACK!!

[Hammer]

"A mere flesh wound"

[Octavius]

You can download the whole script here:

http://www.intriguing.com/mp/_scripts/grail.asp

[toonmilo]

Excellent, just been looking at the script (thanks Octavious!) I love Scene 14, when the father telling the guards to make sure young herbert doesn't leave the room. And making sure he doesn't sing!!!!......Stop That! Stop That!!!

[BigDogsWang]

How about some 'Meaning of Life' quotes?

My favorite "Learning the piano? And I suppose you want to go and practice eh? Marching up and down the square not good enough for you, eh?

Right, off you go then!"

"What about the rest of you? Rather be at the pictures I suppose? Right, off you go"

"Bloody Army, don't know what it's coming to"

[toonmilo]

Whats the AB record for the longest thread? This is the longest i've seen! (Bet its not even close though!!) I admit i have been guilty of adding a large amount of answers on this thread!! - I cant help it, i'm soooooo bored at work today!!!

Ooh! Another one.......Crucifixion??? err no, Freedom actually. what? Yeah, they said i aint done anything, so they can let me go!, Ok off you go then!.......Nahhhh, only pulling yer leg, its crucifixion actually!

[BigDogsWang]

"Line on the...."

"Yeah I know, one cross each"

[Octavius]

MOL...

Dad: The mill's closed. There's no more work, we're destitute.  I've got no option but to sell you all for scientific experiments.  No no, that's the way it is my loves... Blame the Catholic church for not letting me wear one of those little rubber things... Oh they've done some wonderful things in their time, they preserved the might and majesty, even the mystery of the Church of Rome, the sanctity of the sacrament and the indivisible oneness of the Trinity, but if they'd let me wear one of the little rubber things on the end of my c***k we     wouldn't be in the mess we are now.

Little Boy: Couldn't Mummy have worn some sort of pessary?

[Litchick]

Re: the Judean People's Front bit:

"Where's the Popular Front?"

"He's over there...."

[fat robert]

Black Knight: I'm Invincible!

Arthur: You're a loony!

[Guinevere]

Huge.....tracks of land!

[Hammer]

Splitter !!!

[liamtrader]

What's myrrh

A balm

A bomb (screams)

[liamtrader]

in addition to johnthepalmf's quote

how sahll we f**k off oh Messiah