"Does Scotland have some resource that we know nothing about that will fund it all?" You'll hear soon enough so I can exclusively reveal the secret haggis mines in the Trossachs and the off-grid Edinburgh Rock quarries dotted around the capital. They're the backbone of our burgeoning economy, supporting over-promoted local councillors and their...
Yes, you have to shoot a haggis. They have two long legs and two short legs to help them run round the mountains. The haggis season runs from September to March.
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