Immigrant swans

[THECORBYLOON]

With the news that the dead mute swan in Fife was actually an immigrant whooper, does this not typify this country's lax controls, wi the bird trying to sneak in by sea in order to receive treatment fae the SSPCA?

[spudqueen]

I know, next thing they'll trying flying in low where radar can't detect them!

[jno]

It's a heartrending story TCL, these birds are crammed into the back of lorries several thousand at a time after being relieved of their life's savings by cruel snakehead gang bosses, then dumped somewhere in the North Sea to make their own way across the channel. I think we should start a fund for them or something.

[THECORBYLOON]

Pretty soon, we'll be swamped wi these bloody foreigners who'll spend all day doing nothing, honking the odds (I KNOW geese honk but then again maybe they have a poor sense of smell) swiping wir bread while wir own mute swans mope around in silence, starving to death and waiting to be made into matches.....

[jno]

I know, you just try to find a local-born ballerina on the lake these days. It's worse than grey squirrels.

[Booldawg]

why not? everyone else tries to 'sneak in by sea'

[libertie]

Yes, no doubt that now it's been made known that it was an immigrant swan, many people will be saying....oh well serves it right then, should have stayed in it's own country!!!

[gessoo]

Where's Ward Minter ;o). Come on WM you must add to this.

[gessoo]

TCL You have made my day with this question LOL!

[mata hari]

they said on the news that they couldnt identify the type of swan, because it had "lost it's head", so there we are then, it obviously couldnt see where it was going!!!!

[gessoo]

Brilliant, MH, LOL!!

This is making my boring work enjoyable!!

[Trojanfarce]

I reckon that a very serious cover up has been perpetrated by the heads of the SSPCA and it won't be long before this innocent swan's family are flown over for talks at the highest level with a view to demanding the resignation of the Scottish Chief Inspector (SSPCA) and vast sums of cash in compo.

Not to mention a nice crusty cobbler or two.

[netibiza]

Well TCL how did Brenda sneak in eh???? Don't tell me she's legit - too much of a hoodlum that one.

[jno]

mata hari, the suggestion that the only reason anybody would go to Scotland is 'by mistake' is probably not one you should make to TCL

[ianess]

What about a line of defence and just shoot any illegal immigrants on sight?

[Booldawg]

corby & scotland are pretty much the same place anyway.

[THECORBYLOON]

Booldawg, yir nae wrang! Netz, Brenda The Elephant has all her paperwork in order, as Hamish "The Fixer" McSpreader will confrim. Rumours that the swan was in fact an escaped Amazonian parrot by the name of "Bruiser" are being denied by the SSPCA so no doubt the inquiry will follow.

[netibiza]

Listen TCL don't forget that when I was in charge of Brenda she somehow managed to get Spanish nationality and caused a right old shindig at customs when they asked to explore her trunk.

[THECORBYLOON]

There was a spell when Brenda The Elephant had a phobia about a doormat but three months' therapy revealed a confusion about a matador........

[netibiza]

Oh yes, I'd forgotten about the matador, in fact he's still locked in the cellar - ooops......................

[THECORBYLOON]

Do you not realise there are bulls running rampant in china-shops even as we speak, all for the want of a handy matador?