Showing off...

[Jemisa]

A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend. She was thrilled at the speed.

"If I do 200mph, will you take off your clothes?" he asked.

"Yes!" said his adventurous girlfriend.

And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes.

Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over. The naked girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel.

"Go and get help!" he cried.

"But I can't. I'm naked and my clothes are gone!"

"Take my shoe", he said, "and cover yourself."

Holding the shoe over her pubes, the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, "Please help me! My boyfriend's stuck!"

The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, "There's nothing I can do...he's in too far."

[marval]

Oldie but goodie lol

[askyourgran]

That was a good one .. still chuckling.

[robert551069]

Atomic Mass: Accepted at 55kg, but known to vary from 45kg to 225kg.
Physical Properties: 1. Boils at nothing, freezes for no apparent reason.2. Melts if given special treatment
Chemical Properties: 1.Affinity to gold, silver, platinum and diamonds. 2.Explodes spontaneously, without warning or reason. 3. Greatly increased activity when saturated with alcohol.
Common Use: Can be a great aid to relaxation.
Tests:1. Pure specimens turn bright pink when discovered in natural state.
2. Turns green when placed alongside superior specimen.

[robert551069]

My post of 7.47 am should have had the title "Analysis of a woman"

[starone]

Great jem. haven't heard it before and robert has given us two for one. lol twice

[Jemisa]

Thanx Starbi.

Robert, you should have your own thread. :)

Jem.