Quasimodo Comes Home

[dickythecook]

Quasimodo comes home from a hard days bellringing at Notre Dame and sees Esmerelda in the kitchen with a wok in her hand. He says, in his best Charles Laughton voice, "Esmerelda! You know I don't like chinese food." She replies, " I am not cooking, I'm ironing your work shirts!"

[Zacs-Master]

Ancient.

[Clanad]

As is:
Quasimodo realizes he is nearing retirement age and has to choose and train a replacement.
After several interviews, he begins the training with the novice bell ringer. Quasimodo explains to him that the secret of the mellow tones he, Quasimodo has been able to elicit from the bells Of Notre Dame for so many years lies in the fact that he doesn't actually use the clappers but swings rapidly on a length of rope towards each bell and strikes each one with his forehead!
The novice is completing initial training and comes time to practice his forehead thing. As he swings at full speed towards the first bell... he flinches at the last moment, loses his balance and falls head first over the parapet to the pavement below...
Two villagers happen along just at that moment... one, using his toe turns over the now very dead body. "Hmmm"... he says to the other villager... "Do you know him?"... the second villager says ... "No... but his face rings a bell"...

[dickythecook]

Blame excel 1. It was his joke "stir fry" that reminded me.
And by the way Zacs, I am not ancient, I am dickyth.....oh I see what you mean. Nurse!

[chrisgel]

Quasimodo is getting married and his mum says to him "When they're taking the wedding photos make sure that you face the camera at all times so that your hump doesn't show up".
When he gets home from his honeymoon he phones his mum and says "How did the photos turn out?"
His mum says "Oh the photos were fine but we can't get the album to shut"