News1 min ago
Racist Joke....
The angel Gabriel said to God
What you working on today? God said I`m making a place called Scotland, It`s goin to have stunning mountains with fast flowing rivers full of beautifull brown trout, the most beautiful lochs, a stunning coastline, with lush green land and fantastic blue skies and sunsets that will blow your mind, the people are going to be friendly and intelligent and I`m going to give them a national drink called whisky.
Gabriel said
Aren`t you being a bit OTT with this Scotland? the people will think they are already in Heaven.
Na not really said God
Wait till I tell you about the neighbours
What you working on today? God said I`m making a place called Scotland, It`s goin to have stunning mountains with fast flowing rivers full of beautifull brown trout, the most beautiful lochs, a stunning coastline, with lush green land and fantastic blue skies and sunsets that will blow your mind, the people are going to be friendly and intelligent and I`m going to give them a national drink called whisky.
Gabriel said
Aren`t you being a bit OTT with this Scotland? the people will think they are already in Heaven.
Na not really said God
Wait till I tell you about the neighbours
Answers
Which reminds me ... The galley slaves were taking a rest after a full day rowing under merciless sun with the sound of the slave driver's gong still ringing in their ears. "It's not the captain's waterskiing that bothers me so much" said one slave to his shipmate. "It's that gong, gong, gong every two seconds. I'm going to get rid of it" The slaves decide that...
20:03 Fri 02nd Jan 2015
Which reminds me ...
The galley slaves were taking a rest after a full day rowing under merciless sun with the sound of the slave driver's gong still ringing in their ears.
"It's not the captain's waterskiing that bothers me so much" said one slave to his shipmate. "It's that gong, gong, gong every two seconds. I'm going to get rid of it"
The slaves decide that under cover of darkness, they would lift the gong from its chains and throw it overboard.
"We can't do it like that" suggested one of the plotters "They would be sure to hear us - we'll have to find a way to slip it quietly into the water".
So that night, six of the slaves lifted the heavy gong and carried it carefully to the stern of the galley - but there was no way to slip the gong into the water without banging it noisily on the boat.
"I have it! - I'll slip under the rail and hold on with my back to the stern, then I will act as a slide for you to ease the gong over my body and quietly into the water", said the brightest of the slaves.
This was working perfectly, when suddenly the slave driver appeared behind the plotters.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he shouted.
To a man, the men sprang to attention, and burst into song ...
One, two, three -
"We're sliding a gong on the chest of a slave ...."
The galley slaves were taking a rest after a full day rowing under merciless sun with the sound of the slave driver's gong still ringing in their ears.
"It's not the captain's waterskiing that bothers me so much" said one slave to his shipmate. "It's that gong, gong, gong every two seconds. I'm going to get rid of it"
The slaves decide that under cover of darkness, they would lift the gong from its chains and throw it overboard.
"We can't do it like that" suggested one of the plotters "They would be sure to hear us - we'll have to find a way to slip it quietly into the water".
So that night, six of the slaves lifted the heavy gong and carried it carefully to the stern of the galley - but there was no way to slip the gong into the water without banging it noisily on the boat.
"I have it! - I'll slip under the rail and hold on with my back to the stern, then I will act as a slide for you to ease the gong over my body and quietly into the water", said the brightest of the slaves.
This was working perfectly, when suddenly the slave driver appeared behind the plotters.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he shouted.
To a man, the men sprang to attention, and burst into song ...
One, two, three -
"We're sliding a gong on the chest of a slave ...."