Funny Legal Definitions

[marval]

Affidavit –Davit is first in line. You’re second.

Assault – usually paired with a pepper

Bribe – married to a Groom

Caveat emptor – time to fill up the caveat

Contempt – offering sweets to a prison inmate

Contract – acreage owned by a prisoner

Defamation – advice from someone who is hearing impaired

Ex parte – My former husband is a party animal.

Hung jury – Those guys are studs!

Malpractice – what Mal, the doctor, does

Miranda warning – Stay off your porch!

Misdemeanor – daughter of Mr .Demeanor

Mistrial – when you oversleep and are late to court

Oath – what we feed the horse

Order in the Court – See what the judge will have.

Paralegals – two attorneys

Parole – the way your dad should act

Plaintiff – not a fancy fight

Probate – stuff that really catches fish

Pro bono – when you prefer Sonny over Cher

Rescind – what you do when your first email doesn’t go through

Retainer – Hire her now!