The Drunk And The Priest

[retrocop]

A drunk got on a bus one day and sat down next to a priest.The drunk stank of wine, his shirt was stained, his face was all red, and he had a half-empty bottle of wine sticking out of his pocket.He opened his newspaper and started reading. A couple of minutes later, he asked the priest, “Father, what causes arthritis?”The priest replied, “Mister, it’s caused by loose living, being with cheap, wicked women, too much alcohol, and contempt for your fellow man.”“Imagine that,” the drunk muttered. He returned to reading his paper.The priest, thinking about what he had said, turned to the man and apologised. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to come on so strong. How long have you had arthritis?”“I don’t have arthritis, Father,” the drunk said, “but I just read in the paper that the Pope does.”
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A preacher was completing a temperance sermon: with great expression he said, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.”With even greater emphasis, he said, “And if I had all the wine in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.”And then, finally, he said, “And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I’d take it and throw it into the river.” He sat down.The song leader then stood very cautiously and announced with a pleasant smile, “For our closing song, let us sing Hymn #365: ‘Shall We Gather At the River.'”

A man got 2 wishes from god. He asked for the best wine and best woman.Next moment, he had the best wine and Mother Theresa next to him.Moral: Be Specific.

[Patsy33]

Lol..