Crosswords1 min ago
Superhero
If I was a superhero, I would be Aluminium Man. My superpower would be foiling crime.
You have to look hard to be an auctioneer. It is essential to look forbidding.
I have just taken a bold risk and downloaded some audio recording software for my computer. The Audacity!
I was interviewed for a job at McDonald’s and the woman asked me what position I was aiming for. “You can take your pick from the karma sutra if you hire me,” I replied.
My partner said he is worried about the dreams he keeps having where he turns into a nuclear rod that’s gone dry. I think he is overreacting.
A bartender drowned in a tidal wave of tonic water after a case exploded, he was schwepped away.
I bought a train ticket and the driver said, “Eurostar.” I said, “Well I’ve been on telly but I’m no Dean Martin.” Still, at least it’s comfortable on Eurostar, it is murder on the Orient Express.
I could have made a career as a professional snooker player, if only I had got a break.
My dyslexic brother signed up to some conservation society. He couldn’t understand why they just sat around talking.
This makes no sense, yesterday my calculator was working fine, today it isn’t working at all. It just doesn’t add up.
You have to look hard to be an auctioneer. It is essential to look forbidding.
I have just taken a bold risk and downloaded some audio recording software for my computer. The Audacity!
I was interviewed for a job at McDonald’s and the woman asked me what position I was aiming for. “You can take your pick from the karma sutra if you hire me,” I replied.
My partner said he is worried about the dreams he keeps having where he turns into a nuclear rod that’s gone dry. I think he is overreacting.
A bartender drowned in a tidal wave of tonic water after a case exploded, he was schwepped away.
I bought a train ticket and the driver said, “Eurostar.” I said, “Well I’ve been on telly but I’m no Dean Martin.” Still, at least it’s comfortable on Eurostar, it is murder on the Orient Express.
I could have made a career as a professional snooker player, if only I had got a break.
My dyslexic brother signed up to some conservation society. He couldn’t understand why they just sat around talking.
This makes no sense, yesterday my calculator was working fine, today it isn’t working at all. It just doesn’t add up.
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