Round The Bend

[marval]

My partner is always driving me round the bend. One day he will learn how to use roundabouts properly.

I just drank some wkd with ice in it. It was wicked.

I’ve recently been buying loads of umbrellas and water-proof jackets. I am going to save them for a rainy day.

My job interview didn’t go very well. They asked “What will you be bringing to this job?” I don’t think “My briefcase” was the answer they were looking for.

My father dedicated his life to get rid of annoying churches in neighbourhoods across the world. He won a No Bell peace prize.

I have just been to Greenwich in London. I had a mean time.

I was sitting among a tribe of cannibals when one handed me a plate full of human digits. It was a finger buffet.

My dog is getting slow in his old age. He has just brought me yesterday’s newspaper.

I am a director and I am looking for someone to act as a bee for a new film. If anyone is interested, give me a buzz.

My friend has just been fined one thousand pounds for repeatedly ignoring warnings from the council about noise pollution. He thinks it is unfair but to be honest, I think it was a sound conviction.

[Canary42]

[Spicerack]

I believe Sting is looking for work.

[Patsy33]

I echo that last one, Marval!...Good ones...