Two snails took their shell-suits off and were slugging it out.
It took ages.
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The police have finally found the guys who stole kid's my fireworks.
But they let them off.
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This time a year ago my wife drove me to watch the RAF display team the Red Arrows.
I'll never forget the looks of horror from everyone, the close shaves with death, the gasps, the near misses as everyone covered their eyes and winced.