Touché

[Canary42]

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A burglary was recently committed at a Crossword Fan’s house and the entire contents of the trophy room were stolen. The police are looking for a man with a black and white chequered carpet.

If you tell a girl you like her but she says, 'I love you too much', suggest a cross word. Unless you're a crossword fan, in which case she probably is frustrated by your permanent one down.