My Car

[Rondy]

I once bought a wooden car, with a wooden engine, wooden doors, wooden wheels, and wooden seats.

I then put the wooden key in the wooden ignition.
Doh!! The damn thing wooden start.

[Hopkirk]

I've just twigged what you are saying.

You need to spruce it up.

[davebro]

Take it to a branch of halfords

[wiltsman]

Wooden you believe it, the wheels are knot going round!

[davebro]

anything in the trunk?

[maggiebee]

Oh, leaf it out!

[Canary42]

You needed fill it with petrol first.

[ZebuSanctuary]

Not to worry. It's a common all garden problem. Most likely to be a fault with the transmission system. Check for clutch elm disease!

[Bazile]

Did you buy it from oak furniture land ?

[Patsy33]

Not a Poplar idea then?!..

[ZebuSanctuary]

// Not a Poplar //

Oh! I 'm sure he said it was a Ford.

[wiltsman]

I think you should check the shrub caps.

[Hopkirk]

Has the driver's seat got enough lumber support?

[Patsy33]

Zebu, think you got hold of wrong end of stick..

[Hopkirk]

The car needs some treetment.

[ZebuSanctuary]

Yew really should look under the offside wheel larch too!

[Hopkirk]

You were told not to buy it. You should have listened to your elders.

[ZebuSanctuary]

Patsy, you really should know better than to go poking around in my gear-boxwood.

[Patsy33]

Rondy, are you sure it's your car? Better look in log book..

[ZebuSanctuary]

// Rondy, are you sure it's your car? //

Will you stop whittling on!

[Hopkirk]

The mechanic was stumped.