William Shakespeare goes into a pub...

[Ian1]

William Shakespeare goes into a pub and orders a pint of beer. The landlord looks at him and says "I can't serve you, you're bard".

[squarebear]

Van Gogh goes into the same pub and his mate asks him if he wants a drink.

"No thanks", said Vincent, "I've got one ear".

[jackthehat]

A piece of string walks into a pub and the Barman says "We don't serve your sort in here" and throws him out.........

He walks back in a little later having ruffled his hair and rumpled his clothes........

" Oi ! I told you..........we don't serve your sort in here !" says the Barman.

"Why not ?" asks the piece of string.

" Because you're a piece of string, aren't you ?"

The piece of string draws himself up to his full height and says " I'm a frayed knot !!"...........