Modern Technology
A man goes into a quiet pub early one evening, sits himself at the bar and orders a beer. After a while he has another and the barman who's been watching him says 'scuse me but I can't help noticing you keep pulling at your cuff and talking into your sleeve'. The man replies 'I've got one of these new fangled phones - it's an implant under the skin in my wrist'. The barman doesn't believe him but says nothing.
The man then goes off to the gents and is gone for a long term. Cocerned for his wellbeing the barman goes to the gents to check the guy is Ok. On walking in he sees the man bent over with his trousers and pants down and several sheets of loo paper hanging from his arse. The barman says 'you allright mate?' to which the man replies 'Yes I'm fine, just waiting for a fax'