True story this. One morning this lad arrives 1/2 hour late in the office. His appearance is all dishevelled, unshaven, his hair uncombed.
As he sits at his desk, this other guy looks at him and notices he has some white powder down the front of his trousers. Quick as a flash, he says 'f*cking hell mate, you're supposed to put talcum powder around your b*ll*cks BEFORE you put your trousers on!'