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Do you know some good insults??

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Raydude | 12:37 Wed 04th Aug 2004 | Phrases & Sayings
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I'd like to insult someone...can you help me with some nasty insults or rebuffs (eg. .. Don't slice me up with your sharp tongue) .. its all for fun. A friend and I regularly try to out-insult each other.. :-D
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How about "Saucer of milk over here!" or "Can you scratch your ear with your back foot? Most bitches can!"
If you had a brain cell it would die of lonliness. May the fleas of a thousand camels invade your armpits. May you ears turn into ar***h***s and s**t on your shoulders. Can I help you out?...which way did you come in? Can you follow the example of your head and come to the point.
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Somwhere, a perfectly good village is missing an idiot...!!
Is there a Sanity Clause in this (document) you've given me ?
And my all-time favourite Number One.. Not strictly speaking an insult, but.. "You know, I'd buy you a parachute but I'd be scared it might open". (Thank you forever, and R.I.P. Groucho Marx).
"Who cuts your hair? The council?"
The best insults are from Winston Churchill: "I am very drunk madam and you are very ugly, in the morning I'll be sober!" Lady to WC "If I was married to you, I would put poison in your coffee" WC to Lady "If you where my wife, I'd drink it!"
'Don't hate me cos I'm beautiful' always works for me.
How about "You're so stupid that you must be that idiot who keeps asking about tucking blanks into blanks" or "You are a bad mad rancid nankerous skankerous cantankerous intransigent wombat" or "You are a nasty vastly ghastly dastardly b-st-rd"
I'd slap you good looking but i don't have all week
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Try these: I hope your next **** is a hedgehog. It's a battle of wits but I won't fight someone who is unarmed. Your one brain cell must rattle about in there like a marble in a biscuit tin. I've heard you have to take your socks off to count past ten. You've got the sort of face only a hyena would laugh at. What are those marks on your knuckles, have you just learned to walk upright? I won't tread on your toes, you'll get brain damage. If brains were made of dynamite you wouldn't have enough to blow your hat off.
The edited word in the first sentence is S,H, a 1 and a T(had to put it like that to get around the AB edit).
My apologies, Number 5 should read: Yopu've got a face that even a hyena wouldn't laugh at! Also, could I have your picture? I'm on a diet and would like to stick it on the fridge to keep me away.
you were so ugly as a child, your mother had to tie a pork chop around your neck so the dog would go near you.... you were so ugle as achild your mother fed you with a catapult
North Antrim insult Ye buck eedjit
Ur Mum Is So Nasty, When We Had Phone Sex, I Caught An Ear Infection !! ahahahahaa !!

ur so stupid u took a ruler to bed to see how long u slept.


your so poor you can't afford to pay attention - my fave


your so dumb, you would fail a blood test


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