Do You Shop At Waitrose? (Funny)

[Patsy33]

[gness]

Thanks, Patsy! Don't like him much but love this.....now......dare I forward it to my "Waitrose only for us, darling" friends?... ;-)

[emmie]

love him and its true and funny.

[Patsy33]

I've got to be in the mood for him.. This is so true and funny in my eyes. Just popping out to Waitrose with my son now.........

[Arrods]

Here are some of my favourite 'Overheard in Waitrose' (allegedly):


Couple told the assistant they were looking for their “dry aged sirloin steak”. Two thick slices costing £16 later, the assistant said “Enjoy”. “Oh it’s not for us, we’re vegetarians they replied. It’s for Clifford – our dog. It’s his favourite”.

“Sebastian stop hitting your sister, or you won’t get any brioche!”

“Ever since this free coffee offer started, Waitrose has been like a bloody soup kitchen”.

“I can’t believe there are children here. Are we in Asda?”

“Jemima, you’ll have to take the rosemary off the focaccia before we feed the ducks, darling…. They can’t digest it”.

“Please don’t rummage in the reduced bin darling; someone from the golf club might see you”.

“Lucas, put that Falafel down. You already chose olives with Manchego for your treat”.

“Thank you, that will be £428.49”

“Hurry up with the focaccia darling, that man's coming to clean the pool soon”

One mother ticked her son off, saying: “Orlando that's enough blueberries, I only need them to go on top of the venison”.

“Of course I would buy the smoked salmon, but it makes the Maserati smell like a fishmonger's”.

“Darling...kamalata olives not halkidiki. Seriously darling we're having Château Neuf du Pape, not Lambrusco”.

“I’ve found this most perfect house.... but there’s no Waitrose nearby, so we’re still looking”.

“I really can’t be bothered. Shall we just buy everything in here and then throw away what we don’t want?”.

“Mummy is this enough hand wash soap for all the bathrooms?”

"Gosh you have to be millionaires to shop here. Just as well we are!"

"No Sebastian, put them down dear. You know what type of people eat crisps!"

“Make sure you only buy two darling. We don’t want the cashier to think it’s only because of the buy three get one free offer”.

“Daddy does Lego have a silent 'T', like merlot?”

"Luciano behave! Children these days... I blame the au pairs".

“No Jennie, you can’t only serve olives at your tenth birthday party. Now go and fetch a sirloin for the dog”.

[naomi24]

He doesn't know much about Waitrose. Put a pound coin in the trolley? How common! The very idea! No pound coins needed.

[pixie374]

Lol. I love him :-)

[emmie]

must be thinking of those lesser outlets. lol

[naomi24]

Yes, clearly an Asda man, Emmie. ;o)

[Mamyalynne]

It's a very good piece, slightly let down by poor research.

I do like him, his show is back soon too.

I have shopped at Waitrose, but I get them to deliver;-)

[Baldric]

As regular Waitrose shoppers (other S/markets are used but not Aldi, Lidl or Morrisons ;o) the piece was funny, not entirely accurate although some of it was spot-on.

[pixie374]

Ah baldric, I was waiting for you ;-). Comedy often is exaggerated, I don't think that particularly matters.

[bhg481]

Last time we went to Waitrose there was a lady buying peas. She emptied the tray onto the floor, carefully selected only very full pods and then put the rest back.

[Baldric]

Hi Pix, agree with you, it was funny

[gingejbee]

I love Waitrose....but also Lidl/Aldi, too. They are not mutually exclusive, and I find it odd that some think that they are.