Jamie Oliver

[numan]

Does anyone know how Jamie Oliver got his black eye?

[ludwig]

On GMTV he said he woke up one night and wandered to the bathroom feeling a bit groggy. Next thing he knew he was on the floor with his face covered in blood. There wasn't any more explanation than that really.

[andy hughes]

His wife says he fell down stairs and bumped into a door post.

From experience, i know that if you get a black eye, you're better off saying that the husband / wife of your secret lover bopped you one - people will believe that before they believe the real reason!

[Glossopswift]

He tripped on a step and fell onto a door handle, he reckons. Either that or Bernard Matthews has been round and got him back for ruining his Turkey Twizzlers racket.

[numan]

Thanks everyone - so he reckons he did it himself, whatever the method! Well, stranger things have happened, you old cynics!!!

[Lindylou]

I gave myself two black eyes a while ago. Fainted - hit my face on a radiator (didn't feel a thing!) when I woke up, blood everywhere and the following day two loverly black eyes! Wouldn't go out of the house for a week.....

[numan]

Ouch!!! Hope they're better now!

[andy hughes]

I'm quite happy to believe JO's reason. I walked into a door once and gave myself an epic shiner, and everyone I told the truth to simply winked, or nodded knowingly, so i started saying I'd been caught in a 'compromising situation' - which seemed to gain far more easy acceptance! Sometimes truth is just more boring than fiction!

[numan]

Oh, isn't it just!

[landie]

Talking.

When he should have been listening.

[Piper-AK]

I reckon he got 'chopped' in the eyeball by a racked off lamb. God, I'd make a mint out of jokebooks wouldn't I?