The Anti-Social Problem

[Tha-Flash]

How can we help solve the problem of kids/young adults with their anti-social behaviour?

Usually called chavs but I don't want it to turn into a debate about what's defined as a chav.

Many fences, including mine and next door have been kicked in because of this behaviour. I'm 18, about same age as them, lived on this estate most of my life but I'm not doing this type of thing. This is just a single problem for people in my area.

So, how can we help solve the problem of kids/young adults with their anti-social behaviour?

[Lonnie]

Quite simple really, educate the parents.

[Dassie]

After school I reckon all kids should have 1 yr of army training to teach them some discipline before they go out to work as Lonnie is correct.....you can no longer rely on the parents.

[Tha-Flash]

While I agree it's down to the parents, you CANNOT depend on a lot of parents anymore because of the simple fact that some parents are still 14 and haven't even finished their own education yet. It's babies having babies. To me, that is completely screwed up.

I'll be honest, the best idea I've heard yet is COMPULSORY TEMPORARY STERALISATION. It seems to me that this is the best way to prevent the next generation becoming worse than it is now.

This idea is based on the belief that the older you get and the more experience one has in life then the more they will understand then treat people how they wish to be treated.

What do you think?

[noxlumos]

That is very much not the way forward imho, nor is it necessarily the children of children that are the problem. I have seen a lot of antisocial behaviour as I buy up properties in run down areas and re-let them, and some of my tenants are very young single mothers and are by no means the most problematic people I let to.We need to change the way in which we educate our children, the way in which we construct housing estates and we need to alter the socio-economic profile of the worst ones in order to make crime, crap and low esteem something which is viewed as abnormal. I will bet you that there are packs of kids wandering around with sod all to do, whilst their parent drink in the house and ignore them. They vandalise, drink and rob as a matter of course and there will be nothing unusual seen it that. therefore it's normalised behaviour to them. That's what we need to change and sterilisation has nothing to do with it.

[smudge]

Education, Education, Education!!!!

At home & at school.

[smudge]

My parents had lots of children, but not one of us ever brought trouble to their doorstep - why?

Because from a very early age, they taught us to respect others, to be polite, caring, say please, thank you, pardon & excuse me. etc.

They also showed us kindness & most of all love.

Maybe that had something to do with it?

[MaryDou]

Lots of children have suffered from lack of discipline in the home - a child who is given clear boundaries knows that it is loved - not to say that they wont "push their luck" of course they will - but you always have to "be there for them" and whatever happens they have to know that you love and care for them - even if you don't particularly like what they have done in a moment of madness!!! Too many mothers, in particular, are forced out to work and spend hours earning the money for childcare - where pray is that geting us???

[Lonnie]

I didn't put much in my first answer, thinking that people would know what I meant, I can't add anymore to smudges answer, she is 100% correct.

[raysparx1]

I have had a lot of dealings with kids,running boys football teams,and I find it sad that a lot of adults put them down as a waste of time,but most kids are ok,Boredom plays a great part in the anti-social behaviour, what can kids do in the evenings ? where can they go? youth clubs are non existant in most areas, playing fields have been sold off for development, the parents of a lot of them haven't got a clue,the police give them grief if they talk on street corners, We have a responsibility as adults to try and guide them in the right direction, but also if they do cause serious damage the penalties have got to be harsher,it needs a lot of debate.

[Tha-Flash]

We had a youth club in our area but it got wrecked, completely smashed up. I doubt it's the kids who went there though.

I hear all this education, education, education but what about the kids who don't want to learn and end up ruining it for the ones that do want to learn?

[raysparx1]

Hi Tha-Flash,

The kids that don't want to learn should not be allowed to ruin it for those that do, what I have found is all kids like boundaries,give them a line and most will respect it,they will push it,they will try to step over it, I had a lad playing football for me,and everyone said why have you got him in the squad,he is a pain in the ar-e,but I didn't know him,so I wasn't going to judge him on heresay,it turned out he loved football,he was useless at school,but a terrific player but he was always fighting,I took him aside and told him in future he was club captain, I am glad to say he never let me down,when he left us he thanked me and said it was the first time in his life he felt wanted, he is now married and running his own team,so there is hope,lets not give up on them,they are the future after all.

[curiosity]

All of us need some help growing up, we need to know what our basic values are, and also any rules that exist in our family and society and general ethics of communication & respect. Kids who don't get this might feel ashamed and different and live a life wishing they were different, and become angry and confused over this. If when young if they haven't got this, they still need to survive. Their resilience and anger is demonstrated in being hard, and seemingly not caring, when really a bedtime story and someone taking charge would have done the trick. In my view anyway.

[Tha-Flash]

That's good to hear raysparx. That reminds me of Jeremy Kyle, something he would do and I've seen it work myself.

Great replies people, keep 'em coming :)

[Postdog]

Put them in stocks and chuck fruit at them. In my day (god that makes me sound old!!) we were brought up with better values (back to the parents again) and straying from the accepted norm resulted in stigma and shame to some extent.

These days, they can get away with so much and they know it, so I am all for the public humiliation way, be it stocks, publishing photos or whatever.

And being deeper, I think a lot of fault lies in the way our lifestyle is now - everything is "Must have now" and for youngsers and adults (credit cards and debt) this causes a lot of problems.

[raysparx1]

Postdog,

Has raised some good points, "the must have now" society is very sad,not many youngsters will save up money to buy, they want it now, "The stocks" that would be entertaining, we are far too soft on all cases of crime,I do believe,if you hit them hard at the first crime commited it is a deterrant,but I also stick by what I said and that is that "Most" kids are OK. I am in my late fifties and I was a little sod when I was young, so it isn't new, I got clipped round the ear by the police, I had the cane every week at school,it did not stop me, when a teacher realised the only thing that might affect me is "No Football" I started behaving.

[dot.hawkes]

I live in a village that ihas a number of long term drug abusers and alcoholics and petty criminals. they are all in their 30s and 40s and they all have had children by various partners and those children are poorly behaved, wandering the streets til late at night and trying to buy cigs and cider from the offie and wearing hooded tops to try and avoid the passing cop cars. they smell dirty and survive on a packet of custard creams for their tea and go to schooll the next day in scruffy trainers cos their parents have spent their benefit on drugs beer cigs and the bookies.
The kids go to school to get a free school dinner then skive out of school and go into town to dodge the cops again and see what they can scrounge.
These parents can work out how to fill inj a complicated benefit form, why can't they understand about family values and how to provide food and clothing for their kids?

[raysparx1]

Hi dot, the we gotta feel sorry for the kids then haven't we, what chance have they got with wasters for parents,no kid asks to be born, I know you are right in what you say, we could all learn from these people "How to claim" some must have an Honours degree in it.

[mr rusty]

Watch them, follow them home, trash their fence and then post an asnonymous letter saying why you did it and you know where they live....