I Feel Outnumbered Where I Live

[Treacle71]

I live in London and have done since I was born. It's getting to the stage now where I feel I've lost my identity. New people come and go in my area and it's not the same back in the 70s! There is no community whatsoever. I just feel outnumbered now and lost who I am almost. Is it time to move? I've tried with neighbours, but they like to keep to their 'own kind'.

[Bobbisox1]

Isn’t London like that treacle, Cosmopolitan ?

[Hopkirk]

It can be surprising when you get away from London, that people actually look at you and say hello.

[nailit]

(I'll try again)
What do yo mean by their own kind?
Race?
Religion?
Gender?
Class?

[-SharonA-]

Same here Treacle. Neighbours come and go. There is really no sense of community. My neighbour on one side is Somalian and they keep to themselves and on the other side a nice young couple late 20's.

[Redhelen72]

London has always been like that.
If you’re no longer enjoying London can afford to or are able to then move on.

[jno]

happens everywhere: buying a home is hugely expensive so people just rent and move when they need to - maybe getting on their bicycles to look for work as Norman Tebbit said. Or maybe they've worked their way up, or downsized from an empty nest, and bought a place in the country. You can't really demand that people stay put and form a community for your benefit, though, they have their own priorities.

[Hazlinny]

I think you will find this in a lot of towns - seems people just want to get on with their own lives, work, ec. and don't bother about neighbours as was the case in the "old days". If you were to move, you might experience the same feeling, being the "newbie".

[Tilly2]

Are there no local groups you can join? Perhaps you need to make a bit of an effort to get to know a new set of people. See what's going on in your area.

[pixie374]

I'm not sure what "outnumbered" means? By other people? But, I suspect due to more awareness, not everyone automatically trusts everyone else.

[sandyRoe]

Douglas,
Tut tut...

[New Judge]

//London has always been like that.//

No it hasn't.

[Buenchico]

While I'm sure that must be some lovely local communities somewhere within London, it's long been regarded as the unfriendliest city in the country in general.

A move elsewhere might, indeed, be a sound idea but you need to ensure that you choose a city (or town/village) that's known for its warmth. That won't guarantee that you'll bond with your neighbours but it will certainly improve your chances of doing so. For example, I wouldn't recommend moving here to Suffolk, where you usually need to live at one address for at least a decade before any of your neighbours are bold enough to wish you 'good morning'. (I've lived here for over thirty years. I'm on 'nodding terms' with just one neighbour, who's been here for nearly as long, but I don't know anyone else in my street at all. I rather like it that way but I don't think that Suffolk would be for you. Norfolk is probably even worse!).

The friendliest city in the south of England is almost undoubtedly Brighton, where the large gay community seems to contribute to the city's warmth. Further north, Sheffield (where I lived for 20 years) is an amazingly friendly city, as is Liverpool.

[DTCwordfan]

Forget down here....unless you were born in the Duchy......

[douglas9401]

I've forgotten what was there, obviously not on message though.

[jourdain2]

If you feel up for a real change - come North. OH took a while to adjust to people saying 'Hello' (or in one case 'You reet?').
You don't give much to go on. If you are harking back to the 70s it will be a huge change and I would advise going to a smaller town/village.
I know what you mean - I grew up in Bradford, then I worked there. I had nothing in common with the communities which have since formed. Despite best efforts.