14 stone kid. At what point is the mother overwhelmed?

[AB Asks]

A fourteen stone boy who is only 8 years old has been attracting publicity. The boy is four times the average weight for a child his age despite losing more than a stone before Christmas. Reportedly, he struggles when dressing and washing himself, misses school regularly because of poor health and is a target for bullies. His mum has commented that "He refuses to eat fruit, vegetables and salads - he has processed foods. When Connor won't eat anything else, I've got to give him the foods he likes. I can't starve him." What is the best thing to do in this situation?

[B00]

Starve him!

Seriously though- what child of 8 is deliberately going to starve themselves?

I know it's easier said than done when it's not you and your child involved, however i'm convinced if I was faced with this situation i'd be a bit firmer on how long I held out before I served him another cheeseburger with fries!

Also- surely this weight gain has been gradual over the years? The mother/ parent couldn't nip this in the bud before it spiraled out of control? Could this be construed as a form of child abuse?

[pianoman81]

put him in the cupboard under the stairs- get a big strong lock so he cant get out- give him a bowl of water a day- and put a cat flap in the corner- tell him he will be free when the day comes that he can finally fit through it !!!!!!


seriously though - what is the matter with these people ?????

surely when an 8 year old boy gets to 10 stone , the mother should have thought- hello, somethings wrong here???

i do feel sorry for the child though.

but she should starve him.

its like the lardos who say-
its a glandular problem,
or
im big boned
or
its my metabolism

i could continue but wont................

[Ollie_P]

Well having seen a breakwown of his daily intake including suasages, burgers & chips -bearing in mind he's 8 & doesn't have an income to buy this food (which I doubt he cooks himself) - there is quite clearly only 1 person responsible for this situation. The Mother. If he was as seriously underweight as he is overweight he'd of been taken away years ago. Get him away from her or the lad's not going to make it to his 20th Birthday.

[yesmadam]

and the mummy dearest is blaming the doctors lol.....
I blame the gene pool myself.

[B00]

Where did you see this daily intake list from ollie?

Anyone else reckon AB Ed should have attached the news story this is refering to? LOL

[Ollie_P]

It was in the Metro. I would type it out but I finish work at 5.30. If I have chance this evening I'll type it up.

[yesmadam]

Here's The Suns take on him...

http://www.thesun.co.uk/article/0,,2-200709027 9,00.html

and here's The Metro

http://www.metro.co.uk/news/article.html?in_ar ticle_id=38877&in_page_id=34

I do wonder if the doctors did try and get through to this woman.....

[B00]

Thank you for the link- like I said It'd be nice if these AB Ask questions had links to where they got their refrerences from.

Off for a read of above story now.

Thanks for the links again :-)

[drchasuble]

Here's a link to the story in the Guardian: http://www.guardian.co.uk/medicine/story/0,,20 21462,00.html and the Times: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/healt h/article1438220.ece
I've also read about it in the Mail and Daily Mirror today (Have to for work - Not my choice of papers!) and they both included photos. Mother and son both looked almost proud with him perched on his 6th bicycle (having crushed the previous 5).

The blame can only lie with the mother. She is the one buying all the processed junk that he is eating. She says that he won't touch fruit, veg or salad. If that's all he's given he'll get hungry enough and eat it. She obviously just doesn't want to deal with the tantrums that he'll throw and the mood swings as his body is weaned off all the preservatives, excess salt and sugar.

I wasn't a large child but I was a very fussy eater as a child. My father would allow no alternatives and we would jolly well eat what was put in front of us. However long it took. I soon learned that tantrums and tears would get me nowhere and that I'd lose out on any playtime if I was sat at the dinner table all evening.

It's a simple question of discipline. Not a word understood by children today.

[coco pops]

It's the parents fault. Too many parents give in to their childrens demands instead of saying NO. The child isn't the person cooking or buying the food. Just seen the mother interviewed on tv she seems not want to accept it has a lot to do with her (and) the childs father. She says he throws a wobbly if she doesn't give him what food he wants. Who is in charge of that house???????? I feel really sorry for the child.

[revpat55]

Ollie_P is right - if the child was mal nourished everyone would be screaming for the authorities to take steps. I know it's hard to say no to a child, but there must have been a point where she realised she needed more help than her GP? Let's hope he gets his life back on track

[winny]

Oh where to start. I read the sun articel and simply shouted at the paper. He snacks on 4 packets of crisps and eats at 11am and dinner. It is not necessary. Surely the boy doesnt buy and cook for himself. I think somewhere along the line the mother and grandmother have lost their link with reality. They dont sound as it they have taken anything seriously. It is all crap and theit fault and I dont see how they can fail to see this and defend themselvs over this.
As far as I know the doctors have not diagnosed one of those medical eating and not stopping problems which do exist so there is no defence.

[redcrx]

I think the mother has to take responsibility.
On GMTV yesterday she stated that she'd been offered no help. within minutes she said she'd been referred to a dietician years ago, then said it shouldve been a paediatrician (surely she got some good advice from the dietician)
Then she admitted to not going to appointments that had been made for the boy because she couldnt leave the house due to panic attacks.
Surely a child faced with starvation or healthy food will eat the healthy food.
It should him eating something (i couldnt even work out what it was) and the fat was dripping out of it. If he insists on eating chips then at least she could oven cook potatoes in olive oil or something healthier. make her own burgers perhaps and hide veggies in them.

[jno]

I wonder if having this story splashed across all the papers (and AB, for that matter) makes it any easier for the family? Was there no way it could have been sorted out without dragging everyone onto TV? It all sounds voyeuristic, giving everyone an opportunity to pass judgment on the parenting skills of people they don't know. If the woman's really having panic attacks leaving her home, maybe that needs addressing?

[redcrx]

the mother herself contacted the press as she felt she wasnt getting enough help i think she said.

[yesmadam]

Well, who went to the papers in the first place? and perhaps this being in the papers will teach others the lessons of not giving into the brats and feeding a healthier diet?

and.... what on earth do you think it would take to get through to this family if the dieticians and doctors can't?

Judgment on parenting skills? there are even classes now for the less fortunate, last in line for a brain cell type that have kids and haven't the first clue about how to feed them.
If there was no need for these classes......? there would also be no need for Jamie Oliver to get involved either if the schools had been able to feed them healthy instead of Turkey Ruddy Bird Flu Bernard Mathews specials......

I was brought up with a healthy diet, I'm 40 now and will pass that onto my family.....

How was this woman brought up? on what? or is it like to like?

They are killing their child. Could they not see that?

[chimpanzee]

Starve him!

The mother doesn't care, on trevor macdonalds show she couldn't even be arsed to get out of bed and make his breakfast and get him ready for school! Lazy bitch! Also when his granny made his breakfast it was at least 4 slices of white toast smothered in butter i mean come on, hows that healthy at the amount?! she also said she goes into the cupboards and finds hes ate all the crisps...don't buy the bloody crisps and he can't eat them! it's not rocket science!

i think if he got taken into care it'd give them both a shock and thats good cos is he stays with her she'll kill him.

[shaneystar2]

Some people are very quick to judge ..I think Social Services wanted to take him into care before he had even seen a specialist to check any hormonnal imbalance .I do blame the Mum in way because had he been mine I would have banging on the Doctors door non stop.

I have a relative who suffers from Prada Willi Syndrome....which is an awful thing and this all sounds very real to me ...the tantrums ..eating for eatings sake and mainly junk food .I wonder if this has been mentioned to his mother ? Has he been tested for it ?
According to one article he hasn't.

" They haven�t tested for genetic disorders, but in a way I hope he has a disease or syndrome etc"......
Well... he should be tested before they resort to other methods..


I feel sorry for the child ...the publicity will do him more harm than good and his mother should have had the sense in the first place to get him properly assessed.

[chimpanzee]

shaneystar I know about PWS but if his mother hasn't had the gumption to take him to the doctors about his weight gain and PUSH for him to be tested (and lets face it with the state of the NHS we have to push for these tests!) then she isn't a good mother at all. She doesn't deserve to call herself mother. Any decent mother would push to find otu what's wrong with their kid. I guess she knows deep down the white loaf a day and numerous choccie biscuits, crisps and chips don't exactly help.

[MWB]

The (quasi) mother must take responsibility! Same as people who don't have insurance, then there's a flood and their house is destroyed - THEN they bleat that the government must help them! RESPONSIBILITY!!!!