Money and Manners

[naomi24]

Does lack of money mean lack of manners? Can people be poor but polite, or is good breeding confined to the wealthy?

[jno]

'good breeding' doesn't necessarily imply good manners. The club - Bullingdon, is it? - that Boris Johnson and David Cameron used to belong to was noted for trashing expensive restaurants then leaving a cheque to cover the damage. No doubt the proprietors would say this was preferable to being trashed by chavs who DIDN'T pay, but from the point of view of 'manners' I can't see any difference

[Theland1]

I don't know if you might be interested in my own view of me?
But here goes.
I don't have much money, and since finishing work in February, my assets dwindle alarmingly. However, despite odd failings, (because I'm human), I do try to go out of my way to be always well mannered, to the extent of making sure that the company I am in, is at least comfortable, even if I fail to make them feel downright good about themselves.
However, (there's always a, "however," isn't there?), my sense of humour is not everybodys' cup of tea, and may offend on occasion, but I hope not.
So, no, to your question, lack of money does not mean lack of manners.

[ludwig]

I don't think there's any correlation between manners and money whatsoever. If anything it probably works the other way around to what you're suggesting - ie the richer you get the ruder and more arrogant you get.

[keyplus90]

In my own experience I have seen life as,

Richer you are less happier, less polite, less satisfied, less patient, less thankful and last but not least less well mannered you are. With the exeption of few.

[naomi24]

Ludwig, I'm not suggesting anything. It's just a question, and 'breeding' is the operative word. I actually think that jno's reference to Boris Johnson and co is a good example of money not necessarily equating to breeding.

[andy-hughes]

Society is made up of many strata, and it's impossible to generalise too far.

Poor people can be the sole of courtesy, rich people can be boorish and ignorant, and the opposite applies, but they are extremes. In between you have every shade of combinations of money and manners, which prove that there are no hard and fast rules about this kind of thing.

[ludwig]

Naomi, I'm not trying to be argumentative honestly, but I'm not sure what you're after with this question - surely no-one is seriously going to say - 'yes only the wealthy have good breeding and are therefore capable of good manners'?

[Octavius]

Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter what fork you use.

[brionon]

She was poor but she was honest---and well mannered !

[Octavius]

You mean she didn't ask for payment first brionon?

[naomi24]

Ludwig, I'm not after anything except people's views.

[China Doll]

I was brought up without much money (well dragged up kicking and screaming really) but I can pass for a well mannered person. I generally say please and thank you and always apologise when someone else bumps in to me. I even know which fork to use.

However those same good manners do tend to go a little scue-wiff in crowds, at tube stations and generally around too many people in a small space doing stupid things.

My sister however is a whole different story, talk about demanding!

[Cantadora]

What a peculiar question!

OF COURSE there is no connection whatsoever between money and manners.

How quaint that you seem to imagine that breeding is synonymous with manners!

Have you been at the Mills & Boon?

[Octavius]

Either that or the collective writings of 1st Baron Lytton.

[naomi24]

Cantadora, Now .... I wonder if you're rich or poor? Interesting.

Quaint? Really? What an odd term to use. Is this the sort of thing people in Mills & Boon talk about then?

If you will trouble yourself to read my post, above, you will see I've said quite clearly that I don't believe wealth is synonymous with manners. The question actually stems from something someone said to me, and I simply wondered what other people thought.

I have a sneaking suspicion that you're hiding beneath a new name, Cantadora.

[naomi24]

Oh, so you're into that, are you Octavius? Any good?

[Octavius]

Not really my cuppa, me lady.

[naomi24]

Oh, right. Thought you must have known all about it.

[Octavius]

Whats to know? Girl is lonely, fed up and generally down on her luck, she bumps into the handsomest (sometimes tall as well), smoothest, swarthiest, richest gent in a �.. er polo match or summink, they get jiggy with it and then fall in love, have a few ups and downs (not just between the sheets) then they make up and live happily until the end of the book.

[sense4all]

There is no correlation betwen money and manners. On the whole I am very polite. This is becoming increasingly difficult in a wealthy area with a lot of recently retired male population who think that that they are still CEO of ALL they survey, a much put upon Saturday girl in the local grocers really made my day when she asked how many shares one obnoxious old git had in this familys centuries old ( privately owned ) business. She said "Sir if are not satisfied with the service I have offered you today I will be only too happy to solicit a second opinion from the Managing Director" then shouted " Dad a gentleman here would like a quick word ..."
He beat a hasty retreat. Pmsl.
By the same token we were always brought up that manners cost nothing and I have taught my kids the same. My son can be a cheeky boy ... but people love him so because of his exceptionally good manners.