How Do I Handle Deconverting

[Evan2020]

I was not raised religious and my dad is agnostic and my mom always believed but didn’t go to church but I felt something missing in my life and got into a local Baptist church after I found God on my own in 2019 as I loved the friendly people and the way they preached the Bible and Jesus but then over time realized that no matter how hard I tried I couldn’t leave behind all the rap and rock music I love and friendships I cherish that came from bonding over that music and I then realized it equally wasn’t my true self to oppose homosexuality or think that all non-believers and non-Christians go to hell when I truly thought about it and that my flaws weren’t improving like I thought they would. So my parents would not shame me for making my own decision, but my mom might be a bit disappointed due to the fact that she does think faith is important and appreciates that I led her back to God and going to church but what I really am concerned about is whether or how to tell my church friends who would be legitimately upset and not bother to understand any of my reasons for deconverting and am stuck between dreading the unpleasant conversation but also feeling it’s honest and liberating to tell them and not have them deceived into thinking I am still the believer they know when I am not and then if they want to be friends and are willing to not insist on dwelling on talking to me about reconverting then I can handle that but if they don’t want to keep hanging with me I’ll be fine and probably better hanging with my secular friends and family who appreciate me regardless of beliefs and bond with me over music and other things. Plus, when I at this age of 21 that I am now think of certain things I have done that were so wrong throughout my childhood and teenage years, it makes me question whether my nature really is flawed and needs redeeming, but then when I think of my amazing Dad who is agnostic, I see nothing about him that says sinful in nature. So I really just don’t know how to handle this and if anyone could help I really would appreciate it.

[naomi24]

Evan, you don't 'have' to agree with me. If there's something you disagree with please tell me.

[Evan2020]

Oh right true that is a famous one Naomi. I wonder how much do you care about and think about religion? Like are you one of those atheists who has no interest in it and/or not caring at all about what others believe or do you find religion interesting to study and/or actively oppose religion?

[naomi24]

I've studied religion and its history for years, Evan. I don’t actively oppose religion by joining marches or anything like that, but I will verbally oppose it when it damages innocent people.

[Evan2020]

Wow so cool you have studied it for years and good position to take on the matter. And no you haven’t said anything I can think of that I disagree with. What exactly made you wonder?

[naomi24]

Haha! On this subject people often disagree with me .... so I wondered.

[Evan2020]

They often disagree with you on which thing exactly?

[naomi24]

No one thing. Lots of things. Everyone has their own ideas.

[Evan2020]

Ok. Well ok I meant what topic were you saying many disagree with you on when you said “ On this subject people often disagree with me”?

[Peter Pedant]

You two stop looking at each other's bellybuttons
Noami KNOWS what I mean

Rather obviously you will not show that the bible lies by looking at bible quotes (*) so stop trying !

(*) something called Tarski's theorem on the indefinability of truth - you cannot show truth or falsity without going outside the system. Big deal for 1923 but rather obvious a hundred years later

[naomi24]

I'm not sure what you mean, Evan. People often disagree with me on the subject of religion …. and on other subjects, politics for example. I often disagree with them too. That's the nature of discussion on controversial topics.

[Evan2020]

Ok perfect you clarified perfectly my question I jut wondered exactly what you were referring to when you said “on this subject people often disagree with me” but now I totally get it and so true people do often disagree with one another. Sorry about any confusion on what I meant.

[naomi24]

No problem.

[Evan2020]

Naomi you are amazing! So articulate, knowledgeable and intelligent and you are helping a lot with your encouragement as I am trying to make these difficult decisions about religion. Thank you very much! :)

[naomi24]

Oh my! I'm blushing here! Thanks Evan. You're very kind. I'm always happy to help if I can.

[Evan2020]

My pleasure and thanks you are very kind as well! Why exactly are you blushing? Because usually that’s done out of embarrassment haha!

[Atheist]

I think we may have two robots conversing here. ;-)
So sweet!

[naomi24]

Aww, shucks. Bye for now, Evan.

[Evan2020]

Naomi yeah I’m going to bed too. I will be back again tomorrow. :)

[AuntPG]

Naomi -you do realise this guy is taking the P don't you?

[AuntPG]

Atheist, Nauseatingly so :-)