Latin Mass

[brionon]

i hear that the pope intends to re-introduce the Latin mass. What's wrong with the English language that jesus and his disciples spoke ?

[chakka35]

The trouble is that the beautiful English that Jesus spoke got progressively mangled by frequent texting between himself and his disciples (in the days when mobile phones, understandingly enough, weren't up to much) and ended up as an weird Jewish tongue called Aramaic.
The Roman church couldn't understand this, so they invented their own stuff in Latin.

[chakka35]

Oops! Sorry to barge in. Forceof habit!

[wizard69]

I thought Jesus was Dutch...

[naomi24]

Christianity is double-Dutch!

Hello Chakka - Welcome back.

[jenstar]

Of course Jesus spoke English. I've seen "Jesus Christ Superstar" and he sang in rhyming couplets and everything!

[Octavius]

Would it matter to you what language mass was celebrated in?
Or, bronion, are you worried that when you attend service every Sunday you won�t understand what is being said?

As I understand it, mass is celebrated in many different languages all over the world, but it is reassuring nonetheless that you are �hearing� the Pope.

[brionon]

Sorry I thought everone knows that jesus is an Irishman. I forget the whole proof,but it says ,somethinh like; He lived with his Mother until he was 30,She thinks he's a god,he thinks she's a virgin.

[Octavius]

Oh are you resorting to racism now by insulting the Irish?

[WaldoMcFroog]

How can he be Irish? He's got a Mexican first name.

[jenstar]

Of course he's Irish. That's why, in times of great personal stress and injury, people call out "O'Christ Almighty"!

[Octavius]

JESUS: The Bible was not written in English. What we read in English today are translations from other languages. The books in the Old Testament were written in Hebrew and the New Testament was written in Greek. Hence, the name "Jesus" is a translation of the Greek name "Iesous" (God is salvation). "Iesous" came over into the Latin "Jesu" and finally into English as "Jesus."

Some historians believe that the original Iesous was dialectical to the ancient Greek God - Zeus, which itself came from Dyeus meaning God.

LATIN: The head of the Roman Catholic Church is located in the Vatican City, which is within the vicinity of Rome. Latin is an ancient Indo-European language originally spoken in Latium, the region immediately surrounding Rome. The Latin Vulgate Bible became the definitive and officially promulgated Bible version of the Roman Catholic Church in 382 AD, replacing the previous Vetus Latina.

Maybe this is why the Pope wants to bring back Latin mass?

[brionon]

Octavi, ''The bible wasn't written in English'' -Have you ever thought of a Humour implant ?

[Octavius]

Would it make me spew out the sort of uproarious side-splitting gut-wrenchingly hilarious anecdotes that you entertain us with Br. Onion?

[WaldoMcFroog]

Certainly got to be worth a try if 'Br Onion' is any indicator of your current capabilities...

[Octavius]

Quite right Waldo, that was a bit lame wasn't it. Not my usual mordant standard when faced with such ostentatious hilarity.

Its off to the Bernard Manning Institute Of Comedy for me!

[WaldoMcFroog]

Oh Christ! You're better off with 'Br Onion' than that unfunny f&*$er Manning...

[Octavius]

........Jim Davidson....?

[WaldoMcFroog]

...*now* you're being funny!

[brionon]

Octo, Perhaps not, but rather my feeble attempts at humour than your Pedantry.