Labrador #2

[sunny-dave]

Q: How does a blind skydiver know he's near the ground ?

A: The lead goes slack ...

[Patsy33]

Lol!

A blind man and his guide dog goes into a pub. Suddenly, he starts swinging dog about in each room of pub. Bar man says, "Hey, what you doing?" Man replies, "We're just having a look around"

[EDDIE51]

Another Billy Connolly classic .

[marval]

Two men walked into a pub, one had a poodle and one had a labrador. They noticed on the door it said ‘No dogs’. So they agreed to pretend to be blind. So they walked in and the bar man shouted “Sorry guys, no dogs.”

One man replied “This labrador is my guide dog”, so the barman said OK. But he said to the other man “Sorry, poodles aren’t guide dogs so you cant come in.”

So the man with the poodle replied “What? They’ve given me a poodle as a guide dog?”

[Baldric]

A blind man is walking down the street with his guide dog one day. They come to a busy intersection and the dog, ignoring the high volume of traffic zooming by on the street, leads the blind man right out into the thick of the traffic. This is followed by the screech of tires as panicked drivers try desperately not to run the pair down. Horns blaring, the blind man and the dog finally reach the safety of the sidewalk on the other side of the street and the blind man pulls a cookie out of his coat pocket which he offers to the dog.

A passerby, having observed the near fatal incident, can't control his amazement and says to the blind man, "Why on earth are you rewarding your dog with a cookie? He nearly got you killed!"
The blind man turns partially in his direction and replies, "To find out where his head is, so I can kick his ass!"

[murraymints]

tee hee