The doorbell rang this morning. When I opened the door there was my mother-in-law on the front step.
She said: “Can I stay here for a few days?”
I said: “Of course you can.” And shut the door in her face.
My FIL was driving down the road and was pulled over by a policeman. Walking up to my FIL's car, the policeman said, "Your wife fell out of the car five miles back." My FIL replied, "Thank God for that, I thought I'd gone deaf!"