Over weight and under inspired..

[squirtle]

I am a 32 year old female and am so very unhappy with my body weight and my appearance, I am miserable if i go shopping and see nice clothes and i find myself not wanting to go on nights out with my friends. I have joined a local slimming world as this has worked for me in the past, but this time i have no motivation. I have plenty of ideas for cooking recipes and i tend to buy the correct food stuffs when i go shopping but then i get fed up (literally). I feel that even though i have eaten a hearty meal i am still not satisfied with what i've had. Then i begin to pick at stuff, and i'm afraid that can then lead to me being sick intentionally. I thought it was just a phase but its gotten out of control, i need some help but i don't feel ready to go and blurt out my problem at the doctors. I know that its messing up my whole insides. I feel as though i am obsessed with food. Should i go the doctors or is there somewhere else i can seek advice? I want people to know so they can help but on the other hand i don't want anyone to know because i feel ashamed.

[Ms.Hijinx]

ooo squirtle you're describing how i used to be then i realised that being size 10 wasnt all that and that my world wouldnt magically change to all good cos i was stick thin, learn to love yourself for who you are and go see your doctor bout your food issues you may need a little help to cheer you up you have nothing to be ashamed of hope everything turns out great contact me if you fancy a chat

[squirtle]

Thank you Ms.Hijinx and i appreciate your kind words, I have a loving sister and parents and i'm sure they would help me but i don't want to disappoint them. I have a great guy who I'm pretty sure loves me for who i am. But like you say i have to learn to love myself, or even begin to like it for a start. I guess i was hoping to hear from others experiences that might help me to sort my head out.

[Ms.Hijinx]

your head sounds fine to me just sound like you need a big dose of self esteem reread your post your friends ask you to go out that wouldnt happen if you werent a great person please please cheer up and heres a hug from me bet of luck in however you proceed

[doglady]

My massive top tips for stopping yourself eating too much when it's really hard not to:

When you eat biscuits, decide how many you are going to have, get that many out, and take them away from the biscuit tin. It's much easier not to go back for more. Same with crisps and stuff. Get out how much of the packet you are going to eat, and then throw the rest away.

Get some water with your dinner, and when you've had enough, pour the water over the rest of it. If you are at home, put washing up liquid over your leftovers so you couldn't eat them even if you wanted to.

Try reading Paul McKenna: I Can Make You Thin. It's excellent for tips and things.

Good luck - try not to be so hard on yourself.

[4getmenot]

Well after the above posts I dont know what to say but what a lovely kind person MsHijinx is. :-) some beautiful advice there

[nik1971]

my heart goes out to you squirtle,i know exactly how you feel but as hijinx says learn to love yourself for who you are,as for getting depressed seeing nice clothes...........well,whats stopping you from buying them in a big size?! bigger women look just as beautifull in nice clothes as anyone else!
over the last ten years i have battled bullimia,anorexia and now what im described as is "obese"...such an awful word! ive gone from a 6stone frail waiflike anorexic to a 19 stone big beautifull woman,im much happier now than i ever have been because ive accepted myself the way i am and the way im meant to be............................ok 19st is a bit too much but im working at getting a couple of stone off,but in no way do i want to be anything under a size 16.
squirtle you must learn to love yourself the way you are,please do not feel ashamed...whats so awful about you?!
if you feel you need to see the doc then go,they are there to help you,and have given me much good advice over the years,
good luck and most importantly...keep smiling!!!

nik.xxxx

[Amara]

Hi Squirtle - Firstly you are brave to write all this publicly on here, and the answers so far have hopefully given you some good ideas and encouragement. Remember that food is necessary to fuel your body and keep you healthy, and a long term plan for healthy eating is preferable to short term diets. When we diet and lose weight what tends to happen is we slip back into old habits and the weight goes back on quickly and then some, and we then feel disappointed in ourselves. If you can see a Hypnotherapist and or Nutritionist it would really help you to change your attitude to food and your opinion of yourself. If this is not an option for you then there are lots of self help books available on nutrition and also building self esteem and confidence. In the meantime try to eat small regular meals, cut out white flour/rice/pasta and opt for wholemeal/brown. Less dairy, more fruit and veg and lots of water. Try to also get some exercise each day, even if it is just going for a walk or a swim, exercise is proved to combat feelings of depression and will lift your mood faster than anything. Above all remember that you are a beautiful and special person and you have people around you who love you. It is possible to learn to love yourself and be the person you truly want to be. Much love and light - Amara xx

[fat rascal]

Hi Squirtle(love the name),

i know what you re going thro, have you tried looking at the eating disorders website

www.edauk.com

they have nessage boards and links on how to meet people that are going thro the same thing.

do you have any friends you can chat to?.. but there again it is hard to do that some times, but you know , we are all here so let us all know how you are getting on, you'll get thro this ok.


Fat Rascel

xx

[Cheekystar]

Squirtle, I can really empathise with you, I am / was overweight and kept telling everyone that I was happy with my weight but deep down I wasn't, one day I broke down and told my boyfriend and he agreed to help, we both set a date to start out healthy eating plan and joined the gym, we also have an exercise bike as well.
Just over 2 month on I've lost stone.

My advice is to tell people, it'll really help, find a buddy who also wants to lose weight and do it together, I tired the Paul McKenna cd as well, which was useful.

You need to really want it, and then do everything you can. I would also suggest talking to your GP who may put you on diet tablets.

Good luck
x

[Cheekystar]

mean't to say I've lost 2 stone!

[squirtle]

I would like to thank everyone for your words and advice(i haven't been here for a few days as was off work..shh don't tell the bosses). I think its time i realised that even though i am bigger than how i'd like to be i am happy with my life my job and i do have wonderful friends and family. My boyfriend doesn't appear to have gone off me, he's a pretty good faker if he has. I do aim to lose a couple of stone for health reasons. I guess sometimes i feel like i'm going to be pointed at when i go out as all my waif like friends are with me. I get annoyed as well at the smallminded ness of some people who think i'm happy to be referred to as "the funny one". I could go on and on here but i won't. again evryone thanks. especially you nik1971. As for the name "squirtle" there used to be a race horse out called squirtle turtle and i just thought it was a great name.