Collected Dave's Ashes Today

[rowanwitch]

Yesterday was the eighth anniversary of our meeting, now it all feels real. I will start planning the scattering ceremony now. October in Liverpool maybe. Will probably Use a charter boat to get out into the mouth of the Mersey.

[ummmm]

Emotional. Will you have someone with you? x

[rowanwitch]

I should think a few friends plus my immediate family. The boat takes 12 passengers. I am up to 7 so far. It wasnt bad collecting the ashes but bringing them home..... I felt sick inside.

[ummmm]

I completely understand that. You've been so positive but having to collect your husbands ashes would knock anyone.

It's a very nice way of scattering them but that's going to be hard as well.

How's your leg? I know you were trying to get exercise which we all know helps with mental health.

[Arksided]

awe bless you Rowan, I hope that it all goes well for you, I don't know what Reds wishes were but I'm sure he'd like that.

[Mamyalynne]

That sounds a wonderful idea and something to plan towards, please look after yourself with your poorly leg.x

[rowanwitch]

He wanted me to keep them until I died and be buried with me, i will keep some, because although I had his heart his soul belonged to the sea. A small amount will go to his mother's grave, my Anglesey thread explains why.

[Patsy33]

He'd be so proud of you...I wish all inner strength as you complete his wishes. Take care of yourself.xx

[rowanwitch]

The doctor has decided to refer my leg and the rest of me to the QE, so I am just getting on with stuff.

Dave is in my head looking cross right now, all the time we were together he nagged me into keeping my ancient, threadbare, patched up sofas, I can almost hear him saying Rowan, there was plenty of life left in them. Well there wasn't, there isn't and a new sofa and armchair are being delivered Monday. I know money is going to be tight for a few years but I am sick of rearranging the upholstery every time I sit down. So darling if you are out there...

[ferlew]

My thoughts are with you Rowan, I had some of Mr F's ashes made into a pendant which I wear. The rest are still here awaiting a trip to the Isle of Wight shortly, to join his brother. It was what he wanted.
The first few nights I had the ashes here I felt very sick and nervy, but that wore off after a few days, it's only now, some 10 months later, that I feel I can let him go.
Wishing you the strength to do what you need.

[albaqwerty]

Rowan, I'm sure he wouldn't object to you being comfy.

Ashes - I can't explain too well in the typed word. We scattered my brothers ashes on water far away from the water he died in.
(USA and scattered in Scotland)

Do hope your poorly leg gets better xx

[rowanwitch]

It doesn't feel creepy having them here, it's just a case of where to keep them, seems a bit disrespectful to put him in the cupboard. At least in the hall I can give the box a pat when I go past. Like I used to touch his head when he was alive.

[ferlew]

Mr F's ashes are on a tiny table, next to "his" chair.

[ummmm]

I'd keep them close by.

You're so brave x

[Theland]

When I worked in Cammell Lairds, sometimes on a Sunday morning one of the Mersey ferries used to stop in the middle of the river for about half an hour, and I was told that it was for scattering ashes, laying wreaths, and was accompanied by a short service of respects and remembrance for the bereaved.
I am sure that Merseytravel would have more useful information for you should you be interested.

[rowanwitch]

Thanks, I did wonder, if that might be an option, but apparently you just get a few minutes now. The charter boat option gives you long enough to hold a ceremony and of course there is a degree of privacy. Be nice if we could go right out into the open sea.

I am not brave at all, just have a belief system that takes a lot of the fear and mystery from death. As the song says the harvest doesn't fear the reaper....

Btw it's started raining really hard. Glad I picked him up this morning.