Why lie?

[Tha-Flash]

Why do you think people lie so much (compulsive liars)?

All I can really think of is that because once they told the truth they were punished for it which means they start lying in order to avoid punishment.. now it becomes a pattern unconsciously.

That's why if people screw up and tell the truth I'll give them a chance (mostly whatever it is) but if they screw up again then I don't give them the chance.

Why do you think people lie so much (compulsive liars)?

[Cobra.]

lack of self esteem.

feel inadequate for whatever reason

[laurence2]

Liars are afraid of the truth.

They dig themselves a hole and don't no how to get out of it so to speak, so they dig deeper and deeper, hence compulsive liars.

My brother is a compulsive liar, he is also a compulsive thief, they go hand in hand, we,ve tried helping him to no avail, hes 46 years of age now, hes been the above for 30 odd years, funny really, his 4 brothers, 1 sister & mum & dad ain't like this, i suspose this is where the saying ''BLACK SHEEP OF THE FAMILY'' comes from, its a shame but their are many thousands like my brother out their

[Scarlett]

Yes low self-esteem. They think that if they are themselves people won't like or accept them, so they invent lies or fabrications or exaggerations in order to make their lives sound more interesting or exciting to others.

They lack the ability to accept themselves and therefore assume that other people won't be able to either.

[Tha-Flash]

Great posts :)

I remember seeing a programme on TV (true story) about a narcissist who lied all his life and virtually created another life with these huge lies. It ended up where he killed both his parents.

I think the key is knowing WHY they begin to feel like this and how it can be tackled

[raysparx]

Hi, I really do believe that compulsive liars,start to think what they are saying is true,it must get to a point when it gets a bit confusing, I live by the fact if I don't tell porkies I don't need a good memory

[saxy_jag]

People don't always lie to get out of trouble. As Cobra says, it can be a way of getting people to like you. But then you end up digging yourself deeper when they start asking questions.

Laurence, I disagree. I was a compulsive liar as a teenager - at school, at least. I never stole anything though.

[laurence2]

saxy_ jag, your entitled to your opinion, but liars and thiefs ''DO GO'' hand in hand, how many thiefs own up to what they have done, you will bang your head against the wall all day trying to get the truth out of someone who has thieved.

[Cobra.]

I have met a few compulsive liars.

They do often seem to believe what they say is true.....which is quite strange.

I dont know if maybe it becomes some sort of ************* after a while, that they just cant tell the difference OR that they are so determined for you to believe them that they believe it so much themselves.

If that makes any sense at all.

[havinmysay]

thieves might lie but this doesn't mean all liers thieve

[Tha-Flash]

havinmysay is right. I know someone who would never steal anything but they'd lie their face off.

[Tha-Flash]

But what do you think about a person who tells the truth.. then gets punished.. The more this happens, isn't it true that next time they'll be more likely to lie to avoid punishment?

[havinmysay]

definatly i lied all the time to get out of trouble i was the one with chocolate all over my face but still insisted i hadn't been in the biscuit tin

[Tha-Flash]

classic :p

[pinksmartie]

I don't see the attraction of lying. It's usually found out, and when it's found out the trust is lost. I always feel guilty if i lie (except white lies) and try to void lying if i can.

[pinksmartie]

of course, the chocolate round the face has happened once of twice lol :P