Adoption

[Rockrose]

We are seriously thinking about giving adoption another shot, especially as one of their major objections have gone and the other is to follow shortly.
However, when talking about it last time the family was all together, my beloved MIL stated that 'it would never be a grandchild of mine and I could never treat it as so'
Obviously the SIL and BIL turned round and told her rubbish the child would be their niece or nephew and out child so should not be treated differently but she was adamant - it would not be her grandchild!
My husband and I are now concerned that this could scupper our chances at finally being parents.
Such a shame - you would think she would be happy for us to do such a thing - my father is over the moon at the possibility of becoming a grandpappy.
I suppose the question is - is it fair to bring a child into a family where the matriarch feels like this (even if we pass the strict SS vetting)
Your thoughts please.

[Tilly2]

Thank you, RR. As Anne said earlier, she won't last forever and it is totally unfair of her to ruin your chances of a happy and fulfilled life with an adopted child. Do what you know will make you happy for however many years you have left. Ignore her.

[Rockrose]

Thanks Tilly

[retrocop]

If my mother treated my wife so badly I would of kicked her into touch years ago.

[BANANASPLITS]

We've had our differences on here but I wish you all the best for this ..stuff the MIL it's for you and your hubby no one else hope all goes well x

[Rockrose]

Retro the boys let her away with a lot due to having 2 husbands die. They do crack down on her when she really overstep the mark but generally they treat her like a naughty child

[ducksie]

Go about adopting again RR, whatever NI SS say, you will be the mother of this child, not the MiL that is so far away, I don't think the lucky child that would be granted to you and your husband would be scarred or marred in any way by a meddling old biddy, I never knew my own grandmother, my dad's Mam, she was a battleaxe, thankfully miles away so her opinion never came into decisions my parents made, like someone else said here, MiL won't be around forever, you only have one stab at this life,don't let her stand in the way, you have a lot of love to give, fight for what you want so much and the very best of luck to both of you xx

[Tilly2]

Has she threatened to cut your husband out of her Will over this, RR? That sound like the spiteful thing she would do.

[-SharonA-]

What a heartless woman.

[Rockrose]

No she hasn’t Tilly actually that’s the one thing I have to give her credit for she is adamant that her house will go to my husband as his father paid for it as her other son got loads from his fathers estate

[rockyracoon]

I’ve no sensible answer to give about your MIL, but what I will say is, that having children is the greatest gift in the world. Don’t let that women put you off experiencing that joy.

[Rockrose]

Thank you all so much for your responses and kind words xxx