there is no such thing as my time. i do not currently work, but financially am looking to go back. My husband works full time and comes home to join in the daily chaos, but i do all the housework, cleaning, cooking, homework, general life stuff and have NO ONE to help on the babysitting side. The only rest i get is when they are in bed, i long for the day someone will think twice about my life and offer to take over for an hour or two. At this stage the idea of working sounds beautiful, however saying all that, I love my children to bits and feel lost when they are in bed!!
ideally parents and children should have some separation if only to avoid problems in the future such as when the child goes to school to make the transiton easier, however in a lot of cases such as mine, when there is no-one around you just have to get on with it.
You are lucky to have help, and loving grandparents is the next best thing, don't beat yourself up about having time away, just appreciate every minute you have with her, thats what she needs. if you can give 100% quality time whilst you are around her then you don't need to be defensive about being away.