Good attitude Nailit, give it another go and hopefully it will all begin to fall into place and become easier in time. I can sympathise, I get hypertension and give up before I've started if I feel out of my comfort zone! I never used to be like is but its a challenging and often unsupportive world we live in now.
If it doesnt become easier, and affects you badly, ask to have a word with someone and explain how the admin is aggravating your anxiety . Better that than you lose it!