The Answerbank Fair

[Ken4155]

Roll up! Roll up! To the AnswerBank Fair
Most walks of life can be found there
No 'Bearded' ladies - well, none that I know of
And no 'Herculeans', though one or two show-offs
There's the 'Loony Left' and the 'Rabid Right'
Those who say little, those who'll chat through the night
One or two (although British) who speak Double Dutch
And those who are madder than 'Screaming Lord Sutch'
Timid mice, roaring lions, drama queens
The gamblers, the ramblers, the in-betweens
Those of a sombre, religious bent
Who believe their opinions are 'Heaven-sent'
The jealous, the zealots, the Pious few
The pagans, the fake 'uns, the atheists too

Roll up! Roll up! To the AnswerBank fair
Come sit with us, pull up a chair
Here, you'll find those who state opinions as fact
Those who have no use whatsoever for tact
Then there are those who want nothing more
Then to help educate the weak and the poor
By pointing out where they've gone wrong with their lives
'Et tu, Brute', go sharpen those knives.
Brush up on your Latin and abbreviations
Don't be surprised by a thread's deviations
For many begin with a "Good day" and a smile
And continue that way, though just for a while
Then the 'usual suspects' will begin to bang heads
And the 'Ed' will step in and cancel the threads

Roll up! Roll up! To the AnswerBank Fair
Make yourselves comfy in our welcoming lair
Join the meek, the mild, the 'Snowflakes', aw bless
The 'haves' and 'have-nots', the 'couldn't-care-less'
The malevolent, the benevolent, the Scrooge-like misers
The 24/7ers, the early risers
Those who dig up their pasts to regale
Pull up a sandbag, i'll tell you a tale)
Ex cops, ex Armed Forces, one or two ex-cons
The nostalgic mention of those long since gone
There's the seers, the agreers, the 'nodding heads'
Who like to agree with what old whatsit said
The moaners, the groaners, the denture gnashers
Conspiracy theorists, BBC bashers

Roll up! Roll up! To the AnswerBank Fair
Post your question and we'll be right there
For there are more than a few helpful ones
'What paint to use?', 'How to bake the best scones?'
(And of course it rhymes, i'm a Lancashire Lad
Other pronunciations are just plain bad)
The needy, the greedy, those with a few shilling
Those who can help are exceedingly willing
Answering queries on a myriad of themes
From re-booting computers to the meaning of dreams
Join the workers, the shirkers, the retired and content
Counting their blessings on a life well spent
So, roll up, one and all, the queue begins here
Come, dip your toe in. You've nothing to fear

[Ken4155]

Sly? Moi?

[-SharonA-]

Very good.

[SparklyKid]

Excellent , I have seen a few poems on here but none as brilliant as that.

[Patsy33]

I think you've got it all covered there, Ken!
Excellent, well done.

[teacake44]

Could this be the only thread ever that everyone agrees? because if so, em...... ok I won't spoil it, its ok :0)

[jno]

nobody dares to disagree, teacake, for fear Ken will unleash a deadly limerick naming them.

[Bazile]

Ken - when those at AB towers approach you for its use as an introduction to the site .
My firm has vast experience in intellectual property negotiations

My fees are very reasonable

[Ken4155]

I doubt a "deadly limerick" would pass AB rules, Jno :-) I didn't post it in the expectation that it would meet with universal approval - the AB universe, that is. Quite pleased (and a tad surprised) that so many do actually like it.

[jno]

well, I thought it was clever but perhaps that's because I haven't found anything mentioning me. But I am still running it through my Enigma machine.

[10ClarionSt]

Well it's an excellent piece for sure, but I didn't recognize myself from any of those descriptions, being the modest, thoughtful and caring person that I am. No mention at all there.

[richtee]

Well done Ken, wish you could use your talents to write some of the scripts for the stuff on TV these days- you'r way ahead of most of them.

[Ken4155]

Writing the odd few lines of prose is all well and good, richtee, but the work that must go into writing for tv must be tremendous.
Glad you liked it, though.

[jno]

TV doesn't have to rhyme, though. Apart from the episode of Moonlighting all in iambic pentameter.