Also from LD:
I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be enough."
I can always tell when the mother in law's coming to stay; the mice throw themselves on the traps
I took my mother-in-law to Madame Tussaud's Chamber of Horrors, and one of the attendants said, 'Keep her moving sir, we're stock-taking'
The wife's Mother said, "When you're dead, I'll dance in your grave." I said: "Good, I'm being buried at sea."