Do opposites attract?

[filthiestfis]

Has anyone here ever succesfully had a relationship with someone that was totally different to them? Can it work? Is anyone married to someone that is totally opposite to them?

[OBonio]

I'm a lazy unorganised scruffy git but am married to a very well organised, tidy wife who looks after her appearance.... does that count?

[missyR]

i'm not married but seeing somebody. He is shy and i am loud. He is reasonably short and i am tall. He is 17 and i am 16. He likes rave i like pop. He likes fast food i like italian. But despite all our little differences i have never been happier. The one thing us humans all have is our capability to make somebody laugh, love or cry. No matter how tall you are and how short he is. Opposites do attract. I think it's that ' you say potato i say potaaaato' kinda thing. i say GO for it!!! xx

[filthiestfis]

Nice one missyR but time will tell. I n the long run, will it work out? Also I dont just mean little things like music taste or food but the big picture, like sharing the same beliefs, and yeah-as you pointed out- personality being completely different because it sounds like you are an extrovert and your boyfriend is introverted. I am introverted and wondering if I could ever have a relationship with an extrovert girl because surely she would think that I am boring to get on with? If she likes to go out and dance lots and I prefer a more sedentary lifestyle, then how would we get on?

[noxlumos]

I've been married to my totally different wife for nearly 10 years and I am an insomniac that hates being alone so I go clubbing a lot, wheras clubbing doesn't bother her. I was agressive, she was calm, I wanted and already had lots of children, she had just one when I met her,she is Jewish, I'm a Catholic,I am ambitious and a bit ruthless, she prefers quality in the work she does rather than financial success etc etc etc we are very different people, but what binds us together is that essentially we share the same core values of fairness, how to bring kids up etc. All of the differences of belief etc and social goings on really don't matter as long as you are the same type of people in your deepest selves so I think an extrovert and an intorvert can get along very well.

[missyR]

Well maybe you should compromise. Not all girls are like me. Some are prepared to meet in the middle. Have some quiet time and sometimes you need to let your hair down. Why don't you try doing sometihng like that. But of course i would say that age is a big factor. If you are say 30 and going out with a 20 year old then it's all you can expect really. But if you are young and looking for a partner then thats probably all you can expect, the party girls. Tell me its none of my business, but how old are you? i understand if you don't want to tell me, its just curiosity

[filthiestfis]

Im 25 missy! I dont mind going clubbing, I have done in the past, I do drink of course, but not like all the time. Its not about that though. I am a flexible person willing to compromise. I worry about the potential partner that isnt so flexible. Can you make out that I have met someone that matches my description of opposite? too soon to say anything.

[filthiestfis]

awww thats so nice Pickle :o) but you know something, attitudes have changed since you got together with him. People have become less flexible, look at the state of marriages in this country, for instance. It seems like people arent meant to stay together forever anymore :(

[filthiestfis]

Thanks so much for that insightful response Pickle :o)

I totally agree with you 100%. I am 25 but I think like you do. Perhaps its because my mum and dad have always been together, despite their non stop arguing. People give up too easily nowadays. Like you say, there is no quest to find a soulmate. But that is precisely my quest, and I hope to find her one day. Im certain thatshe is out there.
Marriage is a sham these days.

[boobesque]

i am loud, confident and can talk to anyone in a room, i listen to heavy metal music, am not particularly intelligent. My partner is shy, struggles to even speak to strangers on the phone, listens to classical music and the odd bit of drum and bass and has a very very high IQ, we get on like a house on fire, much to peoples surprise!

[filthiestfis]

wow Booby thats what Im talking about! There really exists a wide disparity between you two! what do you like about him if he is so different to you? how did u get together if you dnt mind me asking ya?

[rugeleyboy]

i am the total opposite to my wife!! i am very laid back,she is fiesty, i am as scruffy as you can get, she is clean and tidy,i have a foul mouth she hardly swears, i am very ambitious and she aint, i like to take the ocasional risk she doesnt!!......... but above all we love each other and have been together nearly 9 years now?

[boobesque]

sorry for late reply filthiest, i was attracted to my partner as he is tall lol and i was drunk, we went on our first date 2 months after meeting and regular texting and something just clicked, he had to have plenty of dutch courage but we were out all night and just had so much to talk about, our differences are what we like about eachother and they work well together, i have calmed considerably and grown up lots, whereas my bloke is now a bit less shy, but we just work well together, its a hard thing to explain!

[filthiestfis]

awww nice one boobesque :o) you're not john Mcririck's booby are you?