A Setback For Toby :(

[pastafreak]

He doesn't like visitors. He disappeared back under the sofa just after daughter and her partner arrived Saturday afternoon. He came out overnight to eat, and I saw him briefly Tuesday morning. But when he heard voices outside, he scooted back under the sofa. He seems far more wary. I got him to come out for his lunch, but he wouldn't move far from safety...constantly looking around.
I feel bad for the poor boy.
Cleo was happy as anything...saying hello after an inspection and sat on laps. She made friends.

[bednobs]

thats a shame, but you cant put visitors on hold especially as theyve been on hold so long already.

[237SJ]

I had a neighbour who had a cat like that. He had two house cats in his flat - one would be all over you, pawing your face etc. The other would do a bunk under the furniture as soon as I arrived and he would stay there until I left. Quite often cats like that can come out of their shell when they are eventually the only cat left but when there are two, the timid one stays that way.

[calmck]

Not unusual. I have one that still disappears when visitors come and have had her for years. Carry on as before. Does he feel comfortable in a carrier? If yes you could put him in before they come. Cover it and have him in the same room so he can hear voices

[Buenchico]

My cats are all utterly terrified just when someone knocks at the door and race upstairs instantly. (If I'm expecting a delivery, I try to intercept the courier outside before he has a chance to knock). If a visitor actually steps inside, even for just a moment, they'll all hide in the attic for hours.

Toby's just a one-person cat, like mine all are. (I like it that way. It makes me feel very privileged).

[pastafreak]

My daughter showed interest in taking Cleo if it would help Toby...
Am I wrong to consider that?

[bednobs]

as a person who has rehomed TWO dogs in the past; no

[burlyshirley]

No, let her have Cleo. I think Toby would be happier being an 'only cat'.

[Smowball]

Oh hope everything is ok xx

[calmck]

If you are committed to Toby it is something to consider. Toby might need to be an only cat. Would your feelings towards him change as you are probably fond of Cleo. A difficult decision but it might be best for Toby

[pastafreak]

I feel that Toby is my first priority. Not just because I made an agreement with the rescue charity, but because I want him to feel safe. I feel fondness for him also...even though it's been at a distance for 6 months!
I took on Cleo based on what I was told about her...that she was timid...and in the belief that she would aid in bringing Toby out of his shell. Instead, her desire to be top cat has caused him to withdraw. I was told he may never be a lap cat and I'm fine with that. I just want him to be able to have access to wherever he wants to go, without being jumped on.
He may be fine someday with a less assertive cat...but he's got to learn he's safe.

[calmck]

I think in your heart you know it would be better for Toby to be the only cat, at least until he feels secure to go where he wants. A new home for Cleo would be the best way forward

[pastafreak]

So true. I don't want to find myself resenting Cleo for holding Toby back. She's really a sweet cat and would settle in well with my daughter.

[calmck]

And you can still see her. Go for it

[pastafreak]

Happy to say he's back to 'normal'...only took 5 days.

[jennyjoan]

I think Cleo would miss Toby and vice versa.

[Canary42]

Toby or not Toby ?

[OK, I'll get my coat]