Technology8 mins ago
Advise needed
38 Answers
Hello all,
well i have been married for 7 years and my husband moved out before Christmas i told him to leave the final straw was he told me he hasnt been in love with me for ages.
I feel so hurt and angry and i know he doesnt deserve my love after everything he has put me through. Here is a short list, cheated on me with a woman, talking on internet to women, joined dating website, angry issues threw our dog by the throat which i then got rehomed and it broke my childrens hearts but i had to do what is best for our dog.
I then found out 6 months ago he is bisexual i tried to be a supportive wife when he told me he had been clearing the history on the computer i also held his hand as he told his mum and explored that side to his sexuality, toys, porn etc.... i didnt want a failed marriage and still loved him even though i was angry at the fact he had lied to me for all that time.
He ended up having sex with a man when we spilt up for a short spell but i forgave him and still wanted this to work.
But this time he has gone i am a mess cant eat sleep and losing weight fast i love him but then i think why, he has taken advantage of my feelings for him and phoned me drunk wanting a friendly voice and telling me he loves me, now he is saying he wants a divorce and is seeing a married woman and she is going to leave her husband for him.
I dont know how to deal with all this, i feel angry, hurt, a longing for this to be untrue and to go back to how it was, disbelief this is real, most of all after all this why and how could i still love him but i do.
well i have been married for 7 years and my husband moved out before Christmas i told him to leave the final straw was he told me he hasnt been in love with me for ages.
I feel so hurt and angry and i know he doesnt deserve my love after everything he has put me through. Here is a short list, cheated on me with a woman, talking on internet to women, joined dating website, angry issues threw our dog by the throat which i then got rehomed and it broke my childrens hearts but i had to do what is best for our dog.
I then found out 6 months ago he is bisexual i tried to be a supportive wife when he told me he had been clearing the history on the computer i also held his hand as he told his mum and explored that side to his sexuality, toys, porn etc.... i didnt want a failed marriage and still loved him even though i was angry at the fact he had lied to me for all that time.
He ended up having sex with a man when we spilt up for a short spell but i forgave him and still wanted this to work.
But this time he has gone i am a mess cant eat sleep and losing weight fast i love him but then i think why, he has taken advantage of my feelings for him and phoned me drunk wanting a friendly voice and telling me he loves me, now he is saying he wants a divorce and is seeing a married woman and she is going to leave her husband for him.
I dont know how to deal with all this, i feel angry, hurt, a longing for this to be untrue and to go back to how it was, disbelief this is real, most of all after all this why and how could i still love him but i do.
Answers
Lisa, this is such a sad story. You have been badly let down, and from what you are saying there is no limit to what he can do in the way of deception. Realisticall
16:16 Tue 17th Jan 2012
Lisa-- you are having a very bad time at the moment and must be very confused.
The main thing as I see it is to protect yourself and the children in everyway you can.
Change all phone numbers as suggested, change the locks to your property.
Contact the C AB with regard to the position of the children , get the facts first before you do anything.
Inform the schools of the children to put them in the picture.
Get an interview with a solicitor to formalise things , claim maintenance and so on.
What is your financial position --are you eligible for any help with things .
The main thing as I see it is to protect yourself and the children in everyway you can.
Change all phone numbers as suggested, change the locks to your property.
Contact the C AB with regard to the position of the children , get the facts first before you do anything.
Inform the schools of the children to put them in the picture.
Get an interview with a solicitor to formalise things , claim maintenance and so on.
What is your financial position --are you eligible for any help with things .
I just wanted to let you all know i have changed my number and blocked his email address from send emails.
I was told today that this was an abusive relationship, so i am asking you lot what you think?? Have i made a big mistake and got into another abusive relationship? I thought because he didnt hit me he was better than my first husband?
I was told today that this was an abusive relationship, so i am asking you lot what you think?? Have i made a big mistake and got into another abusive relationship? I thought because he didnt hit me he was better than my first husband?
Unfortunately some women do have a trend of going with the "wrong men".
Some women mistake control for affection. A man can still love you without control (and physical or mental abuse is a form of control).
I have heard of some women saying that if he hits me he must care about me, which is totally wrong.
I hope you can come through this and find a man who is right for you. There is probably one out there.
Some women mistake control for affection. A man can still love you without control (and physical or mental abuse is a form of control).
I have heard of some women saying that if he hits me he must care about me, which is totally wrong.
I hope you can come through this and find a man who is right for you. There is probably one out there.
I am not going back, dont get me wrong i am lonely but i havent deserved any of that has happened. I was loyal, faithful and loving and gave him everything and if someone can treat me like that is not worth it. But i know today i am feel ok about the situation but tomorrow i need to be strong and not let the loneliness win and the habit
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