sad loss

[perose]

We recently lost ourSally, a rough coated Jack Russell. She was 16 and we had to make that awful decision to take her to the vets to be put to sleep, she had had a mild stroke and was really not at all well, and not at all happy. But oh what an awful wrench, I was a complete wreck for a week and we still miss her so much, we still look for her when we come in and open the door for her in the morning. How long will this last? and please do not tell us to get another dog!

[seekeerz]

so sad to read you post , perose. truly it's a gutwrenching feeling and knowing you've done the very best thing for your friend makes it no easier. I can't tell you a time line, only that it does get easier. I still look to see my chinny cat come walking in the bedroom each morning with a 'how are you today?' look on his face and I lost him August last year, but the utter misery has gone and I remember him with love.

You have my deepest sympathy and I will think of you in the weeks to come Steff

[Pea Pod]

Have you got some photographs of her. Sit and look at these when you are feeling a bit low. At first you will feel sadness, but after a couple of weeks you will look and remember the happy times. Talk about the funny things she did. After 16 years you will still go through the routine you did, but one day you wont and this will be a sign that the healing process has started. Hope this gives you a little comfort.

[Cheekystar]

I lost a sally dog who was 19 and she too had strokes, its never easy, I'd do what Pea Pod suggested and look at photos, maybe if you can change your routine as well. The pain does ease, talk about her to others who knew her and if you haven't already when the time feels right put her things away.
My thoughts go out to you
x

[cameo]

I know how you feel.
We lost our lovely dalmation 3 years ago. It was a very sad time for all of us, especially the kids.
It does get easier, i promise.
About 4 months after she died we got 2 new dogs, who we all live to bits.
But even now, after 3 years we still miss her. She was a big part of our lives for 11 years.
Eventually the pain you feel will subside and you will be left with a warm feeling in your heart whenever you think about her.
XxX

[Carakeel]

perose. so sorry you lost your Sally. Jack Russells are lovely dogs and I am sure she was a pure delight. I lost my beautiful Irish Setter Robin a few years ago. He had been the most amazing friend to us, especially to my son who died of cancer. He used to lie on Kevin's bed at St. Luke's hospice and watch over him as he slept. A few years later I had to have Robin put to sleep as he was in the middle of a severe heart attack when I arrived at the vets. It was unexpected and a terrible shock. My elderly mum aged 20 years within a week of Robin dying. So, ten days later I found a little Shih-Tzu puppy and without telling her in advance, simply placed the pup on her bed. Sammy (now 6) cuddled straight into her arms and the two have been inseparable ever since.
perose, I know you are not ready for another dog. You are hurting a lot right now and that is understandable. But I'm sure Sally would never have wanted to see you so sad, and certainly not to be the cause of your sadness. Think of it that way. Celebrate her life! She was obviously a wonderful companion and you will have so many funny tales to tell about her I am sure. Remind yourself of them every time you think of her. In time, things will get better. Everyone gets though grief at their own pace so be patient with yourself. Promise yourself and her that you will smile whenever you think of her. I still miss my beautiful Robin, but in a way he lives on in my memories and still shares my life with me today - always with a big smile!

[divegirl]

Hi Perose, so sorry to hear of your loss. Loosing any pet is hard, but our dogs are so loyal to us. It will get easier and you must remember she had 16 long good years with you and her life was ended in the kindest way possible. Soon you'll remember the good times and smile.

Thinking of you.

Lisa x

[Roughquest]

My thoughts to you Perose during this very difficult time for you......it will get easier, just take your time and remember everything you can about Sally, talk about her to your friends too that helps so much.
RQ xxx

[perose]

Thank you all for your kind messages, I have put a lovely photo of her in a frame right here in front of me. Yes I have a few tears but it is lovely to look at her friendly face.

[lankeela]

I lost my first German Shepherd in 1988 and yesterday someone on the market had a big sable shepherd that looked just like him. Within seconds of talking to him, the tears were running down my face and the people couldn't understand what was wrong. When I said he reminded me of my Barney, who I had lost, they assumed it was recent, and I think they thought I was a litte bit mad when I said it was all those years ago. Obviously this was an isolated incident but the memory never fades. They are always there at the back of your mind but its not surprising when you probably spend more of your time with them than with most people.

Please don't feel you will be betraying her if you get another dog, they are all different and the efforts you have to make to look after a new one will help you to dwell less on Sally, without ever forgetting her. It is people such as you who should have dogs, rather than some of the morons who illtreat them or let them get out of control like we have heard recently.

[YvonneM]

IF IT SHOULD BE

If it should be that I grow weak
And pain should keep me from my sleep,
Then you must do what must be done,
For this last battle cannot be won.

You will be sad, I understand.
Don't let your grief then stay your hand.
For this day, more than all the rest,
Your love for me must stand the test.

We've had so many happy years.
What is to come can hold no fears.
You'd not want me to suffer so;
The time has come -- please let me go.

Take me where my need they'll tend,
And please stay with me till the end.
Hold me firm and speak to me,
Until my eyes no longer see.

I know in time that you will see
The kindness that you did for me.
Although my tail its last has waved,
From pain and suffering I've been saved.

Please do not grieve -- it must be you
Who had this painful thing to do.
We've been so close, we two, these years;
Don't let your heart hold back its tears.

[divegirl]

awww bu**er....made me cry

[perose]

Thank you YvonneM for your lovely poem, I shed a few tears but I did do the correct thing and I stayed with her till the very end. We did always say that we would never let her suffer when the time came, and the vet was absolutely amazing!

[shaneystar2]

So sorry to hear about your dear pooch perose.
They bring us such a lot of pleasure and it is sad towhen you have to say goodbye.Take heart ..you gave her a long and happy life and will always have happy memories .
Very true , what Kipling wrote..
Brothers and Sisters, I bid you beware; Of giving your heart to a dog to tear. Mine has often been torn.
Shaney sends a wag ..take care xx

[YvonneM]

The poem was given to a friend of mine by her vet.

We have a 14 yrd old lab who is still going bit weak on the back legs deaf as a post but still enjoying life we have just taken her to Cornwall for a weeks holiday.

[ganesh]

My sympathies. I lost my Golden retriever when she was 14
just a couple of years ago.She was very ill in the last year and it was a relief to put her to sleep. I missed her for a very long time and it still makes me sad when I think of her. As an analogy, the wound will heal soon but you'll always have a scar!. And probably this time next year you WILL want another dog and even when you get one you will always remember Sally,and how much you loved her.

[HJT40]

yep the poem did it for me too! I had to take my Gemma pyjamas to the vets last year at 16 and was told she had a burst tumor in her spleen. I knew what I had to do and she made it so much easier by looking me in the eye and licking my face. I knew she was ready and it broke my heart, still upsets me thinking about it. She had been with me through everything, never giving an opinion or disagreeing with me, just tuns of unconditional love. But the thing that makes me happy is that she spent her life with me and gave everything she could uo to the last moment, I am privileged to have known her. We have got another dog and bless, although he is only a puppy, can't quite live up to the memory of Gemma. He tries and I am sure he will manage it one day, but it is fun watching him try. You just have to remember how much love they gave you and you gave them in return, it will make you smile, one day, and then you will know as bad as it seems, the time they spent with you was precious.