ChatterBank1 min ago
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Someone glued my pack of cards together...
I'm finding it hard to deal with.
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IF you close your eyes and rub a kiwi fruit in one hand and rub one of your testicles with the other, it's difficult to tell the difference..It also gets you banned from Tesco’s............
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I fancied a job hypnotising chickens but unfortunately failed the hen trance exam!
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A bloke is by a river in Brazil where a priest is doing baptisms he asks would you like to find jesus yes he says the priest dunks him in when he comes up the priest asks did you find jesus no he says the priest dunks him in again when he comes up he asks "Did you find jesus yet?" spluttering he replies "No are you sure this is where he fell in?"
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Making a spicy soup and I used a cup of herbs.
He won’t mind he has other cups.
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I finally got my organ donor card.
So one of you lucky people will be getting a Yamaha keyboard with a broken harmonica function.
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Tonight in Nando's, while me and the missus were having an argument, my mate stole our garlic bread and coleslaw.
I wish he wouldn't take sides.
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