'Abuse' What Does It Mean To You?

[Khandro]

In no way do I wish to condone the Archbishop's silence, but I was amazed tonight listening to the man who had instigated his downfall, being introduced as someone (forgot his name) who, as a child had been 'abused'.

Images of dreadful acts being being perpetrated on him of a sexual nature when he was a child sprang to my mind.

However, after listening to his suffering for 5 minutes he related how he was 'beaten', he said he was now 60ish.

As a child at Manchester Central Grammar School I was 'beaten' like all the other little swines quite often - deservedly so, and think nothing of it.

When we young rogues and reprobates were in need of chastisement we were sent to the study of the Headmaster, - (a Dr de la Perrelle) and were caned on the ***, (we used to stick blotting paper down our trousers before entering the room).

I think nothing of it, though this current episode has now reminded me. We were also 'strapped' frequently on the palms of our hands with a leather strap which I can still see, bearing the initials M.E.C. (Manchester Education Committee).

Later, rules came in that corporal punishment was  forbidden, something though which went back through Dickens' Victorian England & way further - even to Buddhist Zen Masters slapping the faces of their grateful novices.

I'm not condoning it, but was I 'abused' and was ignoring such abuse worthy of bringing down the Archbishop of Canterbury ?                        

 

 

 

 

[rowanwitch]

During nurse training we had to attend a series of classes on child protection, they included recognising the different types of abuse, and the crossovers between them.  For example a person who is a physical abuser may get a sexual thrill from it, but due to the dopamine effect may need to progress to more and more extreme forms of violent abuse to a niece the same thrill.   A purely sexual abuser is quite rare as they frequently use emotional abuse to obtain compliance.  Emotional or neglectful abuse may be the most common but least understood as it has fewer visible signs.  The same types of abuse can be perpetrated on those within other vulnerable groups including the elderly, the socially isolated and those with disabilities.

Unfortunately where an abuser is in a position of power of authority  their circle will close ranks and may protect them from the consequences.  The commonest abusers who get away with it in this way include religious 'ministers, teachers, medical professionals, and those who take up volunteer  roles to gain access to a target group , the classic dodgy scout leader stereotype.   That said by far the majority of abuse of all three forms happens within a home setting, and an abuse victim may find little or no belief or support when they seek help from other family members.