Long Term Laxative Use

[TrikkiNikki5]

Hi

My girlfriend is taking up to and sometimes above 20 laxatives a week - She's using them mainly to control her weight - Which she doesn't need to as she's a skinny minnie!

But there could be more serious implications like she's become addicted...Is that possible?

What long term damage is she doing to herself? I heard that it can give you a potassium defficiency and give you lazy bowels.

Any ideas what this is doing to her insides and how it will affect her in the future.

I'm worried about her.

[4getmenot]

Morning TrikkyNikkki :-) You should print this out to show to your girlfriend, your body should never be messed with you only have one.

http://www.fruit-eze.com/education/laxative/ha bit.html

[Goodsoulette]

Can you persuadfe her to get some help, she is bullimic.

[sunflower71]

There are a wide variety of long term problems from inefficient bowel movement - she may even Sh!t herself and not be able to control it, through to brittle bone problems.
She does need to get help.

[Pippa68]

As others have said, this is serious.

As well as the complications indicated in 4getmenots link, she is also in danger of bowel/colon conditions such as diverticulitis (in severe cases this can result in her having a colostomy) or even bowel/colon cancer.

Of course she will probably lose her hair & teeth due to insufficiencies, she could age dramatically as her skin will become dehydrated.

[4getmenot]

and all that to look skinny, nice

[TrikkiNikki5]

but she isn't fat.... thats what I dont get. ( nor would she be if she stopped doing that to herself)

Thanks everyone - I know she knows she has a problem, its just a matter of her doing something about it before too much damage is done.

:-)

[4getmenot]

Maybe thats it that she thinks she will if she stops.

[kwicky]

If nothing you say will prevent her taking a laxative why not coax her to take cod liver oil (not capsules). This is the best laxative I know and should not cause any harm.

[dizydosydoll]

Yeah its like Goodsoulette says she is bulimic, people think this is just being sick, but being addicted to laxatives is bulimic as well.

[WendyS]

You are right to be worried about her. She could be doing longterm damage to her body which will not be retaining all the minerals and other proteins provided by her food.
She could also develop ulcerative colitis (permanent bleeding of the bowel) which could result in a colostomy, i.e. having your bowel removed and an exterior bag fitted into which your poo goes through a tube).

Why does she think she's fat and needs to lose weight? Does she suffer from low self-esteem? Many people who have this kind of bulimic illness do.

Try and boost her ego and her self-confidence, and also get her to a doctor. If you want a permanent relationship with her, MARCH her to the doctor on the basis that you're not prepared to consider a long term relationship with her until she's got it sorted.

[TrikkiNikki5]

yup, bang on... low self esteem.

I think she looks fantastic but she doesn't think it. Once someone thinks like that about themselves its very hard to convince them otherwise.

I am always telling her that she is sexy, complementing her on her appearance and saying nice things. I really do want to spend the rest of my life with her but these issues have a tendency to affect everyting we do.

Some nights she doesn't even come round so she can stay home and sit on the toilet i'm sure. Which frustrates me and then I get cross and have a pop at her.

Does anyone know of any websites or helplines where I can get some confidential and anonymous information?

I think running her in to see the doctor might push her away, not encourage her to stop.

I'm getting to the point where I'm afraid to say anything about it for fear of sounding like a reprimand, and not encouraging any positive behaviour....

[Eve]

Sounds like she does have a problem and it may not be a quick or easy thing to fix. I had an eating disorder and was at one point addicted to laxatives, didn't realise until someone took them off my and my reaction said it all.

Even when i realised i had a problem, a long time after most other people realised it and told me so many many times including a doctor who tried to refer me to an eating disorder specialist years before I even acknowledged there was a problem.

Even when I did realise and admit it it took a long time to deal with it and realising you have a problem and wanting and being able to stop are very different things.

Part of the sense of lack of self worth told me that it wasn't serious enough to deserve help, that people would think I was a fraud cos it wasn't as successful as people who'd done "so much better than me" like a friend of mine who nearly died through an eating disorder. Even though I'd ended up in hospital numerous timesm kept collapsing and fainting and doing other things that just horrify me now.

It's not a normal mindset, almost like brainwashing, an addiction or extreme phobia in a way. It's not necessarily about weight and can often be more about control when she doesn't feel in control of something or a self harming aspect. It can be a very destructive and selfish thing almost like it possesses you.

Gradually it takes over until it is in control of you and it takes a lot of strength to be able to control and manage it in order to get better. Hard as it is it needs to come from her and she has to be willing to be helped and help herself.

[Eve]

I found the people who begged and pressured hard to cope with, try sitting down and writing her a letter saying how much you love her and feel about her, how you are worried that her wanting to lose weight may have become something more than that. Say that you know she may find it hard to talk about it to you but that you're there for her and enclose some details of people who could help.

Do some research, talk to some of the organisations out there and get their advice too where you can give more details and maybe get some leaflets and other information you can put with the letter.

Don't expect too much at first or too soon, the ideal thing with a letter is that it can be there when she does want it.

If you want to chat further then i'm on MSN or e.mail on [email protected].

I hope it all works out for you both xxx

[Eve]

Try these links...

This is a really good leaflet...

http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/mentalhealthinformati on/mentalhealthproblems/eatingdisorders/eating disorders.aspx

http://www.edauk.com/Home

http://www.eating-disorders.org.uk/

http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/conditions/mental_ health/disorders_eating.shtml

http://www.eatingdisorderscentre.co.uk/

http://www.rcpsych.ac.uk/mentalhealthinformati on/mentalhealthproblems/eatingdisorders.aspx

[ahar]

maybe the solution isn't to complement her looks more, as if she thinks more laxatives = more complements and attention, why would she want to stop? although obviously don't tell her she looks horrible! i'm doing some work on eating disorders at the moment and the above is right, excessive laxative use can be a symptom of anorexia nervosa or bulimia nervosa, however there is a range of criteria that would need to be met for a full diagnosis of either of these. if she agrees she would probably be better off seeing a doc before it gets any worse, but then she might not agree. its a really difficult situation, i met someone at college with anorexia and a lot of us knew before she would admit she had a problem. hopefully your girlfriend will eventually realise as well, but until she does you can't do much more than be patient and supportive, and try to show her that she isn't only valued by her looks but in other ways as well.

[Roughquest]

She must stop this addiction now before it gets out of control, a close friend of mine took up to 60 laxatives a day, for 20 years - now she has recently been diagnosed with kidney problems and a weak heart, she collapsed recently at her hairdressers and her electrolytes were so low due to lack of salts and minerals, this has done irreversible damage to her heart - hence she continually has really bad palpitations and breathlessness which could lead to a heart attack at any time, she now has to have regular urine checks and fortnightly ECG...please get her to stop. My friend cannot give up the laxatives now as her body wont function anymore without them.